audrey hobert edition
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CYTaVnSv64
want to get into baseball, looks kinda fun
>I don't have sex>this is le end of BritainWind your neck in
What's your vice, lads?
>>225941346Might try Spravato
We at /brit/ are all swole af 6'5 antifa hardmen
>>225941391alcoholism
>>225941391everything
>>225941376its the one thing keeping the spring rolls dry and crispy before you get home?
>>225941391wine, computer porn, hertz hotdogs made of pigs arseholes
got some peppermint tea and it tastes like a piece of gum i picked up off the floor
>>225941391lactation porn
Yeah why have a normal lightbulb in the kitchen when you can have fluorescent lights that take ten seconds to come on and then are too bright and go BZZZZZ and are impossible to replace
>>225941391grandad did number 6
I'm gonna kick em out (the jams)
>>225941391cigarettes
>>225941431anakin was unhinged, i wouldn't have promoted him either.
Mousenonce you do realise the people watching your streams aren't your friends and are only there to take the piss out of you, right?
I've barely made a dent in this Chinese and I'm already stuffed
>>225941431Zoomers are good employees now? They don't know their arse from their elbow
>>225941389the only sport i was good at in school was rounders so i sometimes fantasize about being born in america and becoming a baseball superstar
>>225941430i eat the wilkinger glass jar ones they have 60% chicken and turkey arseholes and 39% pig arseholes and 1% celery and rusk. what are those herta ones like?
got some fruit drops some random girl gave me l;ast night you reckon they're alright? they're wrapped but not sealed
>>225941457>i love oak furniturehave you ever been to oak furniture land?you know its not an amusement park? mad thatthey don't tell you that at all
My mum once made chicken dinosaurs and mashed potatoes without beans as a kid and I spat in her face and my dad beat me so bad to the point they had to sit me down the following day and give me an alibi to tell my teachers and if I said anything else I’d go to an orphanage and never see my family again I understand their reasoning but it’s kinda crazy as an adult I’m supposed to never acknowledge this
>>225941474wasted food award
>>225941457stop posting this horrible image
>>225941496
>>225941469shut your cunt fucking namefag drama ass up fuckass cunt don't care about any one of you namefag /soc/ cunts aside from this rorke geezerotherwise shut the FUCK up
>>225941474You'll be hungry again in twenty minutes though
>>225941474yeah? I was joking earlier that I would gain 1 kilo today but that's exactly what happened
>>225941469we all love him here
>>225941491really nice, i get the jumbo ones and whack a couple in a bit of bread with tommy and yellow mustardabsolutely boshtacular thrice-over
>>225941493she tried to drug you lad
>>225941496you deserved it
What games do you primarily watch on YouTube/ Twitch?
>>225941496kek this was my childhood only I never did anything wrong first they would just beat me when they got angry at anything
>>225941515Excellent post
>>225941508ive only got so many pictures mate.
>>225941496:/ sorry lad, no child should ever experience physical abuse, even if you were a little shit.
had an utterly vile slash incredible wank all day
>>225941563bet he learned his lesson though
>>225941538:/
>>225941561there’s a whole internet of images that you’re free to right click on
>>225941561youre a disgusting pillock
>>225941496no beans?fair reaction, far too dry on their ownhopefully you'll suffocate your parents with a pillow when they get put into a home
my mum wasn't very nice to me but shes dead now so whos the real winner here?
>>225941496Screaming This is proper British parenting and what we need if the uk has any chance of prospering
>>225941531should've eaten them last night might've been raped
Iykyk. Always having to keep one ear open, one headphone off so you can hear dadberg screaming, just in case he decided to come and take it out on you, so you could take time to prepare yourself
>>225941496WtfAre they still alive? Do you still speak to them?
right going to wait for the woke janny brigade to come and ban me nowlet's fucking ave it thenLETS FUCKING AVE IT
>>225941496spitting in your mothers face cos she didn't make the meal exacty as you wanted is utterly wildalmost as bad as your dad beating you uplike that shouldn't have happened to you but honestly you deserved to be smacked
>>225941614Beating your kids is something nons- do and it's why they have to go
>>225941528hmm will have to give them a go. do you buy frenchs mustard or that posh shit in the jar
So it's november is it?Still watching spooky films though aren't INot like there's a better theme for November is there? Could do Noirvember but nah
>>225941496>>225941614sir samefagger
mel
>>225941621and living in a terraced house with paper thin walls so you knew the neighbours could hear your cries but they just didn’t care
>>225941606right but when Burnhammake that make sense then
Remember on holiday in Benidorm when I was about 5 I heard someone at the Butlins-type show we were at say "shit" then when we got back to the hotel I asked my dad what the word "shit" meant and he beat me until my arse cheeks were totally bruised black haha x
>>225941671you are not a bit titty anime girl
my dad used to do the goku powering up thing before he battered me
What celeb would you like to see on Traitors?
>>225941686harsh but fair
>>225941696fucking screaming
>>225941655sainsburys own brand yellow mustardi try to replicate the costco hot dog, which as everyone knows, is the best hot dog on the planetcostco use hellmans mustard but own brand is cheaper
>>225941391city
youre fucking luky you got a beating when i was bad my dad shagged me
>>225941702bob mortimer
>>225941702Amer
Mental how spitting in your mums face is even an option for some of you posh cunts I genuinely believe if I ever spat in my mums face as a child they would both suffocate me and formulate a plan to make it seem like I killed myself My dad literally smashed a tv remote over my head once because I changed the channel to TNA wrestling on a Sunday morning when he wa watching some gimp mechanic show
>>225941676
my mum started slowly ripping up my yu gi oh cards one by one because I refused to swallow paracetamol
>>225941702the king
hope you sent her to the shadow realm
>>225941739>I genuinely believe if I ever spat in my mums face as a child they would both suffocate me and formulate a plan to make it seem like I killed myselfYou're lucky, I think mine would've just killed me on the spot and burnt my remains in the back garden
sailing teacher spanked me in the changing room after a lesson because i capcised my boat again
>>225941739>poshHe didn't even have beans
/brit/ makes so much more sense when you realise most of us came from abusive homesI used to flinch all the time at school when there were loud bangs or whatever as a result of the trauma of home abuse, when the bullies figures that out they were always shadow boxing me 1 cm from my face or just straight up beating me just to see me flinch so they could laugh at it
>>225941781what kind of povvo school did you go to where you had to go to a changing room instead of changing into your sailor outfit in your personal dorm
>>225941727never had that either for fuck sake now im going to have to drive to oldham
>>225941816yeah...
have to be at grandads for 8pm and i need a wank but dont want to smell of semen
I did. Thankfully it was only a few shit cards. Would have been devastated if she got to my blue eyes white dragon or dark magician
used to have a teacher called mr "niggapops"
>>225941702lucy pinder
>>225941846Wrong board mate?
It’s strange the difference between working class parenting and middle class parenting I once accidentally broke my sisters trampoline and my dad ran and soccer kicked me in the chest breaking two off my ribs.He didn’t even have to make me lie, I just assumed I had to lie that I broke my ribs wrestling with my brother or he would brutally beat me
go bullied by the cronem in the showers because my cock was small
whats up, we're all sharing abuse stories now?
back in rhodesia
>>225941845then wank into the sink?
motsi is fit as FUCK tonight
>>225941816>they were always shadow boxing me 1 cm from my facehowling
>>225941845how the fuck is ur grandad still awake at 8pmwhat the fuck r u doing going round hsi at 8pm on a sunday you utter freakand why wud u smell of semen do u ejaculate on your clothe sor in your hair ro some shitjust catch it in a tissue and wash your dick afterwards wtf is wron gwith you
literally all of those posts were me and i made them all up
>>225941854no just talking to myself
>>225941816I came from a middle class home where my mum didn't have to work and she loved me and devoted 100% of her time into raising me, I lived an incredibly comfortable and stable life in a nice detached home in the Home Counties
>>225941845what is it about the anticipation of visiting your grandads makes you so horny you can’t go half an hour without a wank
>>225941856tbf u weren't autistic other lad clearly was
Laughing thinking of all the dogs shaking and cowering because of fireworks the next few days lmao
britain was build on the backs of working class families
>>225941874everyone visits their grandparents on sunday night its tradition
it looms
>>225941816Our mum used to kick me and my little brother out of the house all day when I was 5 and he was 4. On a council estate full of nonces. And now my younger ste siblings who had the nicest upbringing imaginable (partly thanks to me being made to babysit them) take the piss out of me for being a mental alcoholic
>>225941391Sloth / Acedia (Acedia): Spiritual or physical apathy, laziness, and an indifference to one's duties or moral growth.
>>225941913only got two grans both my grandads are dead
>>225941913lunch maybe not night u freak
>>225941739Your parents shouldn't be parents.
>>225941921is this Charls?
>>225941894fucking screaming>>225941913maybe on sunday lunch lol
/brit/ is full of grim mongs from grim mong families who were raped by their dads, what else is new
my parents never laid a finger on me, they were constantly threatening to beat my ass but now that i think about it they never followed through
>>225941885well I was raised in a terraced ex-council house in a povvo post-industrial crime ridden shit hole ex-coal town in the slums of the east midlandsliterally nothing has changed here technologically or culturally since Thatcher destroyed everything my mum used to work 2, sometimes 3 jobs and my dad alternated between beating me and threatening suicide
>>225941930ktim
>>225941949yh
>>225941985lol haha
>>225941995Kek
>>225941995It not right x
Reading other anons posts is giving me some form of schizo satisfaction about my own childhood My own dad was literally a functioning mentally unwell person. He had a good job but I vividly remember one time I wanted him to buy me a South Park dvd box set and he refused and I started screaming at him in HMV and he just seethed in silence until we got to the car As soon as we got to the car he literally strangled me until I almost passed out and when I started hyperventilating and crying he took me burger king and got me one of those shit Burger King mcflurriies and I calmed down
>>225941885why are you on /brit/ then?
Had a non-romantic meeting with a pretty woman and now I'm hyper analysing everything about the half an hour I was talking to herDid I hug her awkwardly? Did I not lead the conversation well enough? Did I linger too long? Did I come off as not manly? Was the farewell awkward?Fuaaark
>>225942001I know a guy that looks just like him but is covered in tattoos
SCREAMING at these childhood runt stories
>>225941496A slap would have been appropriate
listening to the dead kennedys live at the deaf club
>>225942027should be a bk advert
>>225942027lol haha
>>225941921it fucking looms
there's so much trauma on /brit/... :(
the watchhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luaIvQ5w5OI
>>225942038brit is inclusive and everyone is invited
would you white boys ever be brave enough to try some ghanaian food?
>>225942027They don't do mcflurries at burger king
>>225942084it made me the strong gayporn "nigga" i am today
>>225942044your carer won't fuck you mate
>>225941496walked into school with marks on my face after my dad pinched my face for whatever reason and I got pulled up to my head of years, he did the whole how is home life routine and gave me a social service number. appreciated it but was taken aback. didn't help that when people asked the bruises I just told them my dad did it. physical punishment was kinda normal for me
>>225942044me after saying "good morning" and nothing else to the toilfu
tarq bastards have gone silent since reading this thread eh
>>225942054murder charls?
Feeling quirky
>>225942027Unironically the worst form of abuse in this scenario is a Burger King McFlurry instead of taking you to McDonald’s
look at me i'm sandra dee
Sometimes my dad would call up his Triad mate Yan and Yan would have a bunch of Chinese men run a train on me if I was ever naughty
>>225941671a qt
>>225942110At least there's beans so nobody gets spat at in the face
>>225942110these niggas eatin beans
remmeber when my mum used to scream at me that I didnt love her and not speak to me for days like that episode of the simpsons where bart steals the game except it was for no reason at all
>>225941545sctimgood thing my mum's only small but I'm pretty sure she sent me to the hospital once or twice when I was really young
/brit/ uber alles
>>225942182Ancient meme
the audacity of mum not to make beans though
>>225942122lol forgot about that, well not on his face, face tattoos are not popular hereI remember when I watched MDE for the first time in high school and then showed it to some other people, i did feel kind of cool
>>225941944sorry i was having a wank anyway in response to this why not sunday night? your grandparent/s dont get lonely in the long dark evenings?
was suicidal yesterday and today i'm angry
Imagining all the runts here as toddlers getting absolutely heemed and punted by their parents lol
i remember one time i was so stressed from my home life as a little kid i went to the bathroom and started ripping out my hair, my teacher was the first one to notice that half my hair was missing the next morning.
I definitely come from proper working class council scum classWent to school with a bruise on my check from my mum hitting me in the face with my brothers poke ball toy and my science teacher reported it and my dad ended up turning up after schooling to fight him
why is he making up stories about his dad beating him
AI is profoundly brown. I regard people who use it as less than human tbqh.
my parents lever laid a finger on me but looking back they probably should have
>>225942194
it looms for them
>>225942157bpd or narcissist mum?
imagine giving ur own mum an hawk tuah over lack of benesit dont bear thinkin bout
>>225942228vgp
nether regions smell like roast potatoes
Internet used to be fun
>>225942228Lost your job drawing furry porn did you?
>>225942157i'm not even gonna ask
my dad unironically hit me a few times on the arse over the years but it was for my own good and i turned out an alcoholic incel in the end and hes dead so alls well that ends well
What if when you die and you're in the morgue, the morticians laugh at your ugly body and your tiny cock
>>225942282that's why I'll never die
>>225942265all shit now
Sallyman in?
nth for the holodem
There was a girl in our town and everyone knew her dad had nonced her but he never went to prison for it somehow Anyway, the dad eventually killed himself and she turned into some ftm creature covered in stretched out piercings and tattoos seemingly trying to make herself as undesirable to men as possible
>>225942282ill be dead they could fuck me and then stuff my arse and roast and eat me for all i care as i say ill be dead
>>225942248reckon its all part of the same mess
>>225942282Not as bad as spending your life alone because of your paranoia about your body
>>225942282everyone has been laughing at my ugly body and tiny cock my whole life, what diference does it make if they also do it when i'm dead.
>>225942282i plan on being horrifically maimed so i can cause them ptsd for this exact reason
>>225942302Grim
Just wanting to give a polar opposite opinion from the other anons on here I used to properly drive my parents insane as a kid, constantly smashed things, hit my mum numerous times, damaged my dads car and reported him for being a nonce when he wasn’t I remember breaking our front door and my mum crying and begging me to accept help and some therapy bollocks and laughing at her and pulling her by the hair until my sister stopped me Obviously I’m a schizo now as an adult but I’m unironically surprised they never murdered me as a child
>>225942282will have to make sure i die with a lob on
>>225942265Alri Firefoxberg
someone made a funny post about not caring about their body when they die the other day but i cant remember how it went
right well thats a pedo scum posting images of cartoon children then
>>225942282would know, from heaven (got promoted to new god) that theyre just jealous and then id zap them on the spot
>>225942282who cares
fist pig now
what is a whale anyway bizarre things
>>225942265Died in the late 2010s
>>225942274im thinking of specing in to alcoholism do you enjoy it
>>225942321different shades of cluster B personality disorders
>>225942302Many such cases!
Would never be caught dead with any of you freaks in public You unironically have to hit a certain threshold of being normal looking to even be seen with me in public which very few of you can achieve
>>225942389rorkes great great great grandmother, is it?
>>225942330What caused it? Other than the devil of course
>>225942389these niggas love beer
how often do you people think about the childhood abuse you went through?
>>225942282what if they do the opposite and the fit mortician starts fondling your penis and testicles and it’s the only sexual experience your body has ever had
>>225942412good post
>>225942401i feel my emotions very strongly
>>225942302poor lass :(wonder if the dad was nonced to if he offed himself out of possible guilt..
>>225942410thats my dreams ruined then
>>225942423post death erection
nonced people nonce people as the saying goes
>>225942410come off it
so many ESHUTAs to fire off i don't know where to start
>>225942412Just was a horrible cunt desu
it's a holiday in cambodia
im wearing pantyhose
eating gorilla shit
>>225942282Maybe they will be old and experienced morticians who don't give a shit because they've already seen worse
>>225942367qt~
>>225942488bit gay mate
>>225942423lucky, dead AND gets a free wank
>>225942416gp
>>225942485he says nigga in that song i think
Would love a deep dive documentary on uk nonce hunter groupsLiterally working class jobless benefit scrounging council scum baiting mentally unwell spastics so desperate for any form of sex they miss the brief mention of them being 15 despite having a profile picture of a fit 35 year old woman
Just had to sell my whole record collection to buy groceries and pay the mortgage…
>>225942468I was nonced and saw other kids being nonced and I've never nonced a kid myself.
>>225942488never rock the mic with the pantyhose
>>225942115wish I had a fit carer tbqh
>>225942538needs a tribute
>>225942488In the UK we call them tights
>>225942330dying laughing at this not really sure why
>>225942536they're saving kids matewhy are you pro paedo?
>>225942538Let’s dissect this rationally and scientifically Why does he have somewhat normal teeth yet the eyes of a war torn WW2 vet, the skin of a long term alcoholic and the tongue of a heroin addict?
Life in America is hardI work all day fixing airplanes and I struggle while people with email jobs make twice what I do and can work from home doing a total of maybe 30 minutes of actual work a day
Hey now, you're a blacked star
i wear tights quite often ok
>>225942490
>>225942578>fixing airplanessounds funx
>>225942282even in death i would probably get hard because i have an sph fetish
>>225942571I’m anti pedo to be fair but only very, very slightly behind that am I anti council estate scum
>>225942434watch some funny cat vids and laugh out loud unironically
>>225942599umm cute
>>225942577Teeth look welded together with calculus
got some choccy milk
>>225942599are you an actor in a stage play of Peter Pan?
Would you star as the bottom in a gay porno gangbang in exchange for £10,000,000,000?
>>225942577he drinks a lot of milk
>>225942578Mental you can have a good quality of life in the uk claiming pip and not working a second of your life
>>225942577are you blind mate, his teeth are caked in plaque
>>225942536I don't know why more people don't have this opinion. Nearly all the videos are of them harassing retards who have the mental age of whoever they're unwittingly noncing on.
>>225942634no*does it for free*
>>225942634I would do anything for 10 million Boring question
>>225942634depends if its a bbc 'bang or not
>>225942634no, dont have that much and doubt the bank would give me a loan either
oh my days it fucking looms
>>225942536no deep dive is necessary if you have an iq as high or higher than the jobless benefit scrounging council scum you're talking aboutthey do it for views and money, they exist in every country
>>225942400you get 5 good years of drinking every day then you will probably go off the rails. i ended up in hospital loads of times and got dumped and ended up in some terrible states4 years later and i still drink every night just not as much. i have fatty liver and a few other health problems from it. however i still cant imagine life without it. really i probably wont stop unless i get cirrhosisi wouldnt recommend starting because its nearly impossible to stop even if you want to but if you are going down the alcoholic route remember to take vitamins especially thiamine every day or you will end up with irreversable brain damage and dont use paracetamol and try not to smoke or vape
>>225942634better to be a rich fag than a poor fag
trip on
i reckon there's no man alive that can put tights on and not get a stiffynot even gay like that they just feel really good on the skin
>>225942675how the fuck do u actually dsrink every day tho i'm a semi alchie who drinks to black out each week but the one good thing about over indulging so much is it does mostly kill the lust to drink like a lot of days it would be more hassle and effort to drink than not to drink
Any shaggers in
>>225942634why is a grown man asking retarded questions like this?
>>225942681think your fetish is a slippery slope to crossdressing and autognyophilia
>>225942705don't think so
Nonce hunters in the uk is genuinely hilarious They use photos of themselves (for legal purposes) so some random sexless retard sees a picture of a clapped 39 year old and is so desparate to get laid they message them and briefly get told the person is 15 despite looking 45 yet are so desperate to get a blowie they turn up and the cast of shameless if waiting for them with cameras
would you shag a 1:1 clone of yourself?
>>225942706I'll take that as a yes
>>225942737A 2:1 clone perhaps
>>225942634No. I wouldn't sell my soul, I pray.
>>225942751'
>>225942698there is no night where im sitting there stone cold sober thinking you know what i would hate a bottle of wine right now. i enjoy it too muchare you diego btw
>>225942751right
Watching BBC Young Musician: The Final but this autist lass is taking the piss a bit on the violin.Going to switch over to Channel 5 for Microwaves vs Air Fryers: Which Is Better?
>>225942733were you stung?
>>225942681hi
>>225942763>Microwaves vs Air Fryers: Which Is Better?proper telly that
>>225942763Obviously air fryers you mong
ooooh the hokey cokey
>>225942763pretty sure that's a repeat
Awfully depressed this last few weeksMight try the gym or swimming pool or something
>>225942733The cast of shameless kek.I hate those guys. So much crime goes on, why are they fixated on the crime that ends with a man cumming? And 10/10 times a crime hast been committed because it's an adult talk to an adult
paperback writer
>>225942804all owned by china
The nonce who slit his own wrists when the nonce hunters turned up was a legend, obviously it’s grim as fuck but watching them panic and freak out in that video was hilarious
>>225942804I'm going to go now
>>225942820you got a link? I'd be fascinated to watch it
NOW I'M PANICKING
>>225942783Love it when someone calls another person stupid then realises they've misread the post and are the stupid one
>>225942820Did he die?
>>225942761acid reflux?dehydrated sleep?calories/bloating?like sure if i had like 2 drinks a night i guess i could do that in perpetuity but what's the point wouldn't make me feel better basically empty caloriesrather just do 14 drinks every now and then and then kills interest in drinking again
>>225942820Jesus Christ, the fucking balls it must take
>>225941365>>225941365
>>225942783I'll be leaving that conclusion to the guy who does the voiceover for X factor who is narrating the programme
>>225942813Their hearts are in the right place but the thick as pig shit way they go about things just makes you lose all respect for them, same as people sending wages to the gp find me of obvious Mossad directed psyop grofters
>>225942862i imagine with that lifestyle you must be ready to take yourself out at any second
>>225942890No it's not in the right place. Shut up
>>225942820Got the link?
>>225942949>>225942949>>225942949
>>225942603It’s fun and underpaid