Darkseid celebrates life.
A Japanese schoolgirl could fix him. Don't forget he wanted to fuck Supergirl. That's always how it starts. You do not underestimate their level of power.
Just more fuel for the Joker's chair
are Darkeseid and the baby chair connected?
>>156104557Everyone would want Joker dead if it weren't for Mark Hamill.
>WMBF capeslopso fucking common now. im nooticing
>>156104618DARKSEID CELEBRATES A NEW BREED OF HUMAN
He smashed those eggs...
>>156104404Wasn’t it leaked somewhere Catwoman pregnant with twins aka absolute Damian and huntress?
>>156104798Would Bruce go back to Absolute hell to save his stillborn twins' souls?
>>156104838>Would Bruce go back to Absolute hell to save his stillborn twins' souls?That sounds believable.
Such is his design.
>>156104618Better than the other way around.
>>156104618I want more
>>156104798Well that's one way to make Damian brown. And brown Helena again.
>>156105931Finally.Femboy choco Damian.
>>156104601This whole universe is supposed to be Darkseid's ideal universe, canonically, so yes.
>Darkseid: Bruce, you have to breed with Selina! It's all part of my evil plan!
>>156106083is Darkseid ideal universe or the universe IS Darkseid?
>>156104838yes and since he was literally batman he would succeed.>>156104404main line verse = batman is never allowed to have a stable monogamous child bearing dynamic with selina outside of post future events that are never actually shown.dark side event: she's mega preggos with his nut?why do they keep on letting him win?
>>156106103BRUCE PLEASEYOU HAVE TO IMPREGNATE SELINA
>>156106157God I love Chrisposting.
>>156104404Why didn't she wear a shirt that fits?
>>156106157>did it in 25 issuesOur boy moves fast. And deep.
What's ithe point if we can't see her getting absolutely railed while wearing her reflective helmet.
>>156104404>That bastard Batman>I shall make him suffer>I shall take away his wealth>I shall take away his family>I shall make him a pariah in his city >I shall give him a big tittied afro latina girlfriend Oh nooooo Darkseied who'd ever want thaaaaaaaat
>>156106083I haven't been following Absolute, not into AU's, but if this is true it's so weak. Good ol' Apokolips is worse than this.
>>156106157>BRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCE >WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYNE>I. DARKSEID, DEMAND YOU IMPREGNATE SELENA KYLE IMMEDIATELY>IT IS THE ONLY WAY YOUR MISERABLE LIFE CAN HAVE MEANING BEYOND PRAISING DARKSEID>FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. FOR DARKSEID
>>156104798Why is he called Damian if his grandpa wasn't a demon?
If Darkseid was TRULY based he would have made Absolute Batman imgregnate Absolute Amanda Waller
>>156106605I am counting on that.
>>156106106explanation is much longer but basically dc's prime earth gets seperated from the rest of the multiverse, darkseid gets pissed because he's weaker and in an attempt to regain power he lets the justice league "kill" him, which sends him to another universe that's beginning to form, and that somehow allows him to greatly influence said universehe's not directly interfering with specific events, but his will influences and creates certain rules, heroes must suffer, hope is weaker than sheer will and force, etc
>>156104404he'll have to congratulate his dick
>>156105902Your children will still be niggermutts either way.
>>156106831Classic!
>>156106852At least they won't be fatherless hood rats
>>156106831>next issue ends with absolute barbara also with a big belly>bruce building a chocolate harem
>>156104618It was Alan Moore's fault.
>>156106906>Lucius: Now that's more like it, Mr. Wayne.
>>156106906>absolute barbaraHe's fucking her too?
>>156106492I kinda understand Darkseid's plan for Bruce to have sex with women since he's autistic as fuck and having sex is very cringe and nightmarish especially the hotter the woman is. He just doesn't know what to do. Just as DarkSeid planned.
>>156106930No but that doesn't mean it can't happen.
>>156105902Wrong
mainline darkseid : anti-lifeabsolute darkseid : it was me Bruce, I pierced the condom
>>156107122He found the life equation
>>156107183Maybe the real anti-life equation was the 2000s edgy filth we left behind.
He smashed those latina eggs.
>>156104404Absolute Batman at least has shit happen in each issue.Its not my favorite on going but I never feel like I got ripped off by buying an issue
>>156107209The 2010s were worse. Right now is worse.
Imagine the sound of the Bruce Wayne mating pressing that woman. Filling up the life-chalice of Selina with his seed.
>>156106906He better make it an Oreo and impregnate Harley as well.
So all the money she saved up, the private estate she hid away, all for Bruce......is now going to be devoted towards their child, huh?
>>156108353
>>156104404>hmmmmm yes Batman, put your venom enhanced baby batter inside Catwoman>I will make your child eeeeeeeeviiiiilllll
>sex is evil
>>156106605>Absolute Amanda WallerWhy do I get the feeling that she's going to be thin and attractive again instead of a black female version of Kingpin?
>>156104618That is literally the best fucking pairing.
>>156106492>>156106314Darkseid works in mysterious ways.
>>156109006already debuted in absolute green lantern
>>156109006She got revealed at the end of the last issue of Absolute Green Lantern, she's a chunky granny
>>156089924nice denialism>>156091208the game>>156090274go being gay elsewhere, granny.>>156092495>>156092373You first sperg...
