My girlfriend has a combination of severe anxiety and depression. While she is an overall good person and loves helping people out, she can "accidentally" turn into a total bitch if you phrase something wrong. She has gone through phases of this before, but I have no clue what I should do. I find it incredibly difficult to be honest with her, as if I mention at all that she has done something to make me uncomfortable it will often result in a very very long discussion which often ruins the rest of our day and sometimes the following day. Additionally, getting her to take proper care of herself has been a total nightmare. She legitimately has autism and because of this getting her to eat, go to bed, wake up, shower etc on a regular schedule is nearly impossible. You'd never be able to tell as she is an extremely conventionally attractive individual, but these things drive me nuts. Because I have to take care of her so much, and because whenever I am around her I feel like I am walking through a mine field, becoming sexually interested in her has become extremely difficult, making sex a chore. Whats worse is that we both have rather high libidos, and I am her exclusive sexual outlet, so if I'm not down to fuck she gets pent up whereas I'll just jerk off. I have no idea what to do, as I feel as if explaining all of this to her (and all of the little filler details not included in this) may result in us breaking up, which some days I feel as if would be a good thing. I dont know what to fucking do.
>>35051455Break up. You are not compatible
>>35051455No mental disorder EVER excuses her disrespecting you and shitting on you. EVER. Ditch this loser or you will end up miserable. She will ruin you emotionally, mentally, and spiritually in any way she can all in an effort to manipulate and control you.
>>35051475A lot of people have been telling me this, however she has genuinely attempted to change and is making progress, the issue is that I feel as if she is so far down the self sabotage path that any change she may make now will probably be negated at a later date. She knows and is aware that no mental illness excuses her, I genuinely think that she is unaware of what she is doing.
>>35051455she will most likely find a guy willing to take care of her, so if you dont want to do that for her just let her go
>>35051511>she has genuinely attempted to change and is making progressIt's all a manipulative act.>she is unaware of what she is doingShe is fully aware and gaslighting you.My mother did that shit to my father.My father did it right back.
>>35051521She is not trying to be aggressive. If I say she is doing something that annoys me or is making me uncomfortable she will get in a negative mood for the rest of the day and this can carry onto other days unless its resolved. She is obsessed over my comfort to the point of making me uncomfortable. Thats the best way I can explain it.
>>35051533I never said anything about her being aggressive.I said she's lying and gaslighting.You are very stupid.Good luck, retard.You'll need it.
>>35051560Thank you kind sir. I will deal with the issue.
>>35051560At least you caught him larping
>>35051574Sure.
>>35051455Try reading about Borderline Personality Disorder.You mentioned autism, but was it diagnosed by a neuropsychologist?Many times a BPD person can be misdiagnosed.If you think Borderline is a possible match, than we can pinpoint how to navigate through her special needs.
>>35051576Be smart and realize he is larping as me again.
>>35051585To be fair we probably have BPD. My parents were both harsh and neglectful and she was effectively forced to become an adult very early due to mistakes made by her older family members and was expected to fully take care of herself at a very young age. She has not been formally diagnosed with anything except for severe depression, but she was in the process of getting diagnosed with other things.
>>35051588If there's a strong reason to suspect BPD, the good news is that there's already a well-established, evidence-based path toward managing the symptoms.Schema therapy and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), along with proper psychiatric care and medication when appropriate (mostly likely Topamax), are all backed by clinical research.Trying to brute-force your way through BPD on sheer willpower is a dead end. If anything, it can make the fear of abandonment and sensitivity to rejection spiral even further. You can't simply fight your way out of a condition that needs proper treatment.
>>35051604Its going to be a bit before we'll be able to afford mental health care, at least another 8 months. Hopefully we'll be able to make it that long.
Update: Got into a rather large argument with my girlfriend this morning. There is a very large chance we could be breaking up tomorrow because neither of us are going to be able to sit down and discuss things today.
>>35051455I think you are both retards. Immature fucking idiots. You're doing the brain rot thing where you pathologize romance and love, you have turned the relationship into a fucking therapy session. Do you have any idea how stupid that is? Thinking you can diagnose you or her with BPD or autism over a petty lover's quarrel? And instead of telling her everything you told us you appeal for witnesses in fucking strangers on 4chan to tell you how to run your own relationship, and in true internet fashion they tell you to run it into the ground. Your problem is you treat people like projects, you knew who she was when dating and you tried to play 'i can fix her' and you did that codependent shit where you pretended to accept and love her flaws and all but your act got tired and you want to exonerate yourself. Not one single mention of your own faults or own negative contributions.
The fact you even had to ask, dump her
