I've been in a relationship with this girl for 5+ years, which is a first relationship for both of us.The first year was pretty fun. We were still in college, we were going out on dates, walks, drinking, had some things in common, whatever. Leaving the rest of the details aside, I feel completely lost in this relationship. She has no friends, doesn't want to hang out with mine, wants me to just stay with her, gets upset whenever I go out without her (which is very rare, she says she doesn't but always has to rub it in my face that I'm leaving her alone and she'll get bored or whatever). She has a bad relationship with her family, her siblings don't talk with her, her parents are weird and are either with or against her. She doesn't want to ever meet my family, although she accidentally did twice.She has self image issues and badmouths herself on every occasion. All our conversations are centered around her - how bad she looks, how bad she feels, how everyone hates her, how she's bad at her job, how other people have it better than her because they look better, how she'll never make it. No matter what I say, I can never change our conversations. Maybe only temporarily, but it won't take long until she starts again.She doesn't eat, doesn't go out, doesn't do anything fun for herself anymore - just keeps the netflix catalogue in the background, barely even pays attention to it. Doesn't want to do any activity with me either.She used to read, listen to weird music, be fairly knowledgeable, dress cool, have real hobbies. She's nothing like her old self anymore.Right now I don't know what to do anymore. I lost a lot of my old friends, I'm staying with her because I lost my job. I know that the real issue is myself, because I can't help but pay too much attention to her. Although I hate every day with her, I don't want to move on. I despise her but feel like there won't be someone better for me.
>>35049951>She has no friends, doesn't want to hang out with mine, wants me to just stay with her, gets upset whenever I go out without herSo you're obviously attracted to her since you've been in a relationship with her for the past 5 years. Then why are you complaining about this?
>>35049977I don't know man I think I just miss how things used to be, I feel like I'm attracted to a person who's no longer there. I don't want to leave but I don't want my life to be like this anymore either
i mean she seems really insecure of herself, and although you hate her the best you can do is stay with her through it. make her do fun things with you, just like try to make her feel better. it sounds like shes going through a bad mental state right now thats why she seems uninteresting and boring. when shes just watching shit on netflix, do something fun for yourself like read. then invite her to do it with you. if she doesn’t do it oh well, focus on yourself. try to learn more, go to the gym. anything to make you feel better about yourself.you feel unhappy with her but afraid to leave her because you feel like there’s no one else for you, which in most cases isn’t true. theres a bunch of people out there and i hope you either stay with her and eventually become happy or find someone else
>>35049951I feel like I'm a mild version of your gf, childhood abuse and bullying does a number on you and when it comes to girl friendships it makes it insanely hard for other girls to be able to see you as fun/entertaining enough to be considered friend material.You say she has 0 friends but you know she could get male friends (simps) if she wanted to, simply chooses not to. But sounds like you've completely fallen out of love anyhow, you can't save your relationship after that. But do you have the guts to actually end it instead of monkeybranching or cheating, only you know.
