We lost tonight, my dear friends. This was a gambit and it didn't pay off. We were humbled and they can celebrate. It's kind of embarrassing. It's kind of annoying. I feel a bit of envy too. But, what can we do. This was a group decision, we decided for it and at the moment we thought it would be a good idea. In the end though, we're the losers.
Ah, let it be already Wednesday!

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>>35037131 >>35037251 >>35037651

Women actually unironically deserve hate and I haven't heard a single legitimate reason otherwise.

>>35036985
Hate makes the world a less good place and is a torment to the soul

>>35037115
Why are you gay

BUT ALSO YELLING AT PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET IS FUN TEHEHEHEGE

>>35037170
Because its okay to be gay

>>35037218
Its not okay to be a rapist

>>35037221
What if he deserves it?

The time zone is a match.

it's over.

Yeah I'm that bitch whose name starts with J or whatever

>>35036985
Cool. Now do a collage of all the men child abuse reports instead
Women say the same shit about men. You're wasting your energy and mental health with this war of the sexes hate.

>>35037249
I know a woman whose name starts with J

>>35037253
Juanita?

>>35037285
No...

It has slowly dawned on me that a lot of my insecurities and self-loathing are rooted in my childhood. I was ostracised and rejected by my peers, and when I was told, gently, that I had been diagnosed with aspergers when I was little, I began to feel like everyone around me was privy to something about myself that I could not perceive. I felt foolish and worthless. I tried to overcompensate by doing well in school, and putting on this brainy, know-it-all persona. But then I entered high school and had to reckon with the fact that I could not socially integrate with my peers. While they were all getting their drivers licenses, and getting part time jobs, and getting invited to parties, I was staying home, mentally spiralling.

My spirit died completely, and since graduating high school I have been living in a zombified state, trudging listlessly through life, failing in all of my endeavours. And where-ever I go, I am treated like a leper, even by the "neurodivergents". I meet people who moan hysterically about their own mental health struggles, about their suicidality. But when I am sitting across from them they treat me like chopped liver, like I'm nothing. Why? I try to act sensibly, I don't act out. Sure, I stutter from time to time, and I have other anxious, awkward mannerisms, but I would hope that people would see past that. And when I walk down the street, it feels like I am being scrutinised by everyone who glances at me, as if there is somehow a big painted sign around my neck saying "I am a worthless, autistic loser".

>>35037355
Yea, except I do unfortunately act out far, far, far more than I should. Still, it's hard to not believe that you deserve it, even when that is obviously untrue. I have gotten better, but I'm still behind my peers. Do you work?

>>35037227
Go die, for everyone's sake

>>35037285
Jcunt
The j is silent

My name starts with a J. I'm thinking about someone named O. I'm embarrassed about how it all went down between us.

>>35037355
Anon you are not alone. There is a loneliness epidemic with men now. A shit ton of men are lonely. I recently escaped the madness after a therapy session today. It is all in how you accept yourself as a human being who is authentically themselves, not some caricature people desire. Being the caricature is great, but looking back at who you are through it all as someone who is human and make mistakes is necessary. Added too you need to believe in virtue and have purpose in your thoughts, actions, and words. You as well exist as person people relate to through human vulnerability not as a practical individual or an intellectual which is what your peers wanted. The thing is though if they couldn't like the real you they're not worth it. Real people in life you should go for are people who are dead set on being around you and those who see your human side through it all. You're different anon and that is okay.

>>35037382
Why the long face?

>>35036914
im an active medical neglect victim. My parents dont care to take me to regular medical checkups and dont remember to book a doctor's appointment when i complain about pain, so i simply dont get medical care. Im always tired, hurting, or both, but im scared ill get yelled at if i complain too much so i just bottle it in. Ive had depression since i was 9 and been expierncing disability like symptoms since middle school so im worried im just medically fucked forever. When i was 13 i begged my parents to get my bloodwork done (it was 4 years overdue, i hadnt had any since i was a baby) and my mom booked the appointment 6 months out so it would work to qualify me for sports even though i didnt want to do sports (because they hurt too much). I had had an untreated iron deficiency for years. Im worried the damage from that fucked me up permantely too.

Part of it is the terror of being disabled and part of it is the exhaustion of having to pretend im mentally and physically fine + i almost have to act like a parent for my parents sometimes

this is all legal aswell as im still afloat and if im not a fuckup for other people rhan im fine enough for my situation to not count as neglect

I'm going to kill myself in November 2027.

>>35036914
After years of panic attacks and OCD i'm finally on SSRIs but I'm scared i will turn into a normie.

Also I think about this one girl that I met once at the bar more than my ex girlfriend who I thought I was going to marry. LIFE

>>35037249
Why are you a bitch?

Where can I post somebody's name and address so they get bombarded with junk mail?

I told you my terms, man. I'm not tolerating anymore abuse.

>>35037495
Why? That's fucking horrible.

>>35037526
The energy you put out will return to you, eventually. Watch out.

>>35037567
I'm just so pissed at the shitbag who stole my credit card.

>>35037567
>>35037577
I wish he was swinging from a tree.

>>35037495
somewhere in digital space, there is a 10 page list of times that i said was going to kill myself and i never followed through. and they knew i would never follow through because i told them i would kill myself. and i know you're not going to kill yourself because you're telling us now. see you next year.

>>35037472
If your 18 or older just move out nigga or just book medical appointments with a doctor yourself without asking your parents

>>35036914
I think I hate muslims more than I hate my ex. this is a turning point. i would rather be an agnostic crusader than an obsessive incel.

>>35036985
The new propaganda campaign.

I thought I was going to be a loser my whole life, but now I'm doing better than most people around me, and I don't know how to handle that because it does not cure loneliness

>>35037547
What happened desu

i hate myself. everytime i almost learn my lesson i do it again.

>>35037686
Replace your bad addiction by something else. Relapses happen, learn to understand when you're about to fuck up and walk away from it. Easier said than done but with time it does get easier.

>>35037681
Long story or short?

The HMO rental I live in got sold for rock bottom prices, worst part is, it's my bedroom that's the feature picture of the house, which is mortifying as it was taken in absolutely awful condition , which means every other room was somehow far far worse.
I'm a 90th percentile earner and I live with Africans and bums, God have mercy on me.

>>35037757
>I'm a 90th percentile earner and I live with Africans and bums
In which country?

>>35037768
UK. I literally earn £800 a week post tax.
Was struck off from work for 6 months, racked up some £9k in debt.

>>35037367
Not at the moment, but I have before. I'm currently studying and getting paid for it by the government, which covers most of my expenses.

>>35037440
Thanks. I tried therapy a few years ago but the therapist wasn't very good. Then I was told by a GP that I could not see a psychiatrist unless I was already on ssri's. I have a couple of friends but I'm not really in regular contact with anyone.

It’s easier for my to wrap my head around facing prison than slitting my wrist. I no longer have what I need to shoot myself in the head and I can’t obtain it unless I steal it which isn’t worth the risk. I don’t see myself committing to any method of suicide but I’m scared that I will wish I had.

>>35037772
>2800€/mo is 90th percentile in the UK
Jesus fuck dude you need to leave that shithole. Or at least go in the countryside where rent is cheaper

Honestly, I should thank you for that final comment. It's made me much more sure that I'm doing the right thing, and that even if you were to take accountability, it wouldn't be meant. It would be just to humor me, and it would all just keep happening.

>>35037588
I did this too. Now I just don't say anything and am letting it build until I can actually commit to it. I'm at the point where I actually feel a kind of giddiness at the thought of dying and I'm going through my bucket list. Although I guess technically posting this will set me back a bit.

One who shows no remorse, but taunts you with glee at the suffering they’ve caused you. At least I felt shame for my actions. I still do, their cruelty won’t change that, though I’m sure they’ll try.

>Submit yourself to a lie and call yourself a monster or i’ll treat you like one

Agony. And I was the one who never loved according to them. It hurts, they’ve thought it through and decided they want more of it, even when it’s not just you it’ll harm in the long run.

By all means, keep beating the dog, he deserves it for his stupidity.

Cut for 4 days in a row.
Didn't cut today.
Now I feel like I'm an overdramatic piece of shit.
Urge to cut again to correct alleviate that feeling.
Damn.

>I really loved you don’t you get it that’s why I don’t forgive you and lied to you and laugh when you open up to me about your struggles and perspective


>theyve already dumped me and moved on
>im pathetic
>You get what you fucking deserve

I should’ve never shown weakness. I’m sorry father.

And even still…

I

Love


You

>>35038034
Think of it like a drug, like you're going through withdrawals - and you are, cutting releases endorphins. The longer you stay off of it, the easier it will get. Blast some angry music. Move and dance erratically, burn off energy. I'm a few months clean, after having relapsed after many years. Helps if you can identify your triggers and steer clear of those too, until you can build back your resiliency.

>>35038051
I don’t understand why one would start. I helped a girl stop in grade school, but I don’t get the initial desire to begin it.

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>>35038062

>>35038047
Me too fren. Play any good games recently?

>>35038059
Qt cat, played zombies with a few frens a few days ago. You?

I want to be loved and love

Soon I will be 40 years old and still alone.
I don't wish to be alone anymore

>>35038062
Still trying to get through part 1 on all routes of fire emblem fortunes weave. Why is this game so long?

Slow down man I can’t run for president yet.

>>35038055
Especially when it occurs in youth, it's generally due to sustained psychological abuse and a lack of safe attachments that eats away at one's self worth and resiliency leaving them in acute mental (often turned physical) pain. They seek the most available "fix" to stop that pain. It's the same situations that lead to drug and alcohol addictions, which can be harder for youth to access than cutting implements. There's also the visual aspect of the blood, representing the pain leaving your body.

>>35038028

>I reacted poorly to X I’m sorry
>doesn’t matter because you reacted poorly
>I didn’t mean to do it
>doesn’t matter because you did
>I apologized
>doesn’t matter
>I’ve been doing better even though it’s been hard to accommodate you can you show me some grace
>no doesn’t matter
>im just trying to explain
>doesn’t matter you’re dismissing me
>im trying to understand your feelings can you understand mine
>no
>I want you to not do X it’s an expectation and value I hold deeply
>idc I’m not that anymore
>I care about you
>no you don’t because you differ at all from me
>i want to be able to express things in ways that are natural for me
>no, only me
>I feel bad too
>manipulative you only voice your concerns when we’re talking about concerns
>can you please stop calling me X and insulting me when you’re mad
>fuck you X you’re XYZ
>I’ve done so much to show you I care
>doesn’t matter it’s manipulation and not real because you’ve also done bad things under very fucked up circumstances and any attempt to mitigate any of them is delegitimization of my feelings


>the beaten dog merits the beating it because he growled during a previous beating

I forgive you. But I cannot be a punching bag, nor a plot device. You’re under no obligation to forgive me for my sins.

>>35038087

Attention seeking too I imagine for kids. Though the kids that get that far generally probably wouldn’t have people that cared to begin with, or they’re just genetically fucked.

>>35038094
i see their point bro you should probably do some reading

>>35038075
Its really fun, I spent well over 120 hours to beat FW but really enjoyed my time playing it. I like the formula for what they did this time and hope to see them refine it in the next game

>>35038102
On what my nigga?

>>35038075
Never played but it seems decent desu

>>35038121
unironically healthy communication bro like you sound fucked to deal with teebeeache

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>>35038266

I miss her and I havent stopped thinking about her for the past 3 months despite her ignoring me since then. I know that I need to move on but I also want to reach out just to get closure to confirm theres no hope

>>35038135
Explain how, if im crazy I’d like to learn lmfao

My life is nothing. I have nothing and I amount to nothing. I just want to be someone that someone else can't do without

>>35038158
Why?

>>35038144
>im just trying to explain
>doesn’t matter you’re dismissing me
>im trying to understand your feelings can you understand mine
>i want to be able to express things in ways that are natural for me
>manipulative you only voice your concerns when we’re talking about concerns
>I’ve done so much to show you I care
>doesn’t matter it’s manipulation and not real because you’ve also done bad things

idk bruh just getting the vibe that youre making everything about yourself and justifying it because you dont like the discomfort when a nigga tells you theres a problem

>>35038167
Some people just fall through the cracks. Some people didn't believe enough in life, not even as children. Born petrified

>>35038174
That’s not substantive, no one likes when a problem arises, the issue is being able to determine if it’s legitimate and then communicate about it.

>>35038175
Non answer. Think about why you want what you want.

>>35038182
>if it's legitimate
and imma guess youre the one deciding that then
defo seeing why they left you brother

>>35038182
>Think about why you want what you want
I have a personality disorder

>>35038187
Do you think perceived problems are never illegitimate? No miscommunication leading to erroneous or unfair conclusions?

Are you retarded?

>>35038187
Its the guy who got arrested for abusing his gf and blames her for it just ignore him

>>35038194
A personality disorder doesn’t make one want to fall in love. The drive to reproduce does. Now how can you do that?

>>35038197
Definitely not, nor am I Mike.

>>35038196
>Are you retarded?
nah bro, just happily married, have a good one

>>35038205
Good dodge. Nigger!

>>35038197
Kek he's still here? My new favorite lolcow. Nigga loves playing victim.

Nigga nigga nigga that’s all you black motherfuckers talk about is niggas

>>35038199
By putting myself out there more, by giving life a chance. But I don't want to. It makes me cringe because inside it makes me want to cry. I actually want to lay on the grave I dug for myself, but I'm also so sensitive that many times I feel the need to cry when I see people out there loving each other, having fun, enjoying their lives in their simple and placid ways, not entirely out of pity for myself like the sad bastard that I am, but also genuinely out of secondhand joy. That means I'm not lost yet, but I want to be because it's easier.

>>35038222
a nigga gotta announce himself

>>35038226
That’s a good assessment. One thing about BDP girlies and ED girlies is they’re usually actually introspective when they aren’t self destructing. How can you control the latter to find a suitable man to indulge in the former?

>>35038204
nobody thinks youre mike, cuz mike would never abuse his lover <3

>>35038232
I'm a dude

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>>35038529

Me and my gf bought a custom-made, expensive cabinet. We chose everything from the shape, shelves, wood, etc. The guys came by to install it and I had to be at work but she could work from home so she was here while they assembled it, and... It's the absolute wrong color. The one we bought was elegant, gorgeous, perfect. The one we had delivered looks like a hospital cabinet. It's solid white. I fucking despise it. She sent me a picture and called me while they were almost done assembling it.
Couldn't you have fucking said something when you saw the huge blinding white wood planks entering our home? The guy at the store tried to gaslight me into thinking we chose that garish, ridiculous color. My gf said she likes it, it looks good with the lighting, etc. But I fucking hate it. Every time I look at it, it's a reminder that I cannot trust her with the important stuff. She was right there while they raped our cabinet.
Is this what the "ick" feels like?

>>35038233
Maria cucked him, she deserves it.
>>35038234
Then just lift weights, BPD and ED are not correlated positively with anything as a man. They’re problems to be worked through. Obstacles to be overcome, a woman will not save you. Internalize that ans better yourself.

>>35037745
Long

>>35038241
>Then just lift weights
Fuck off you hylic cunt. You have nothing useful to say

>>35038245
Cope and seethe about the primordial truth. Your tears trigger a mother instinct rather than a desire instinct in women.

>>35038252
Do you consume anything outside of manosphere self-sucking podcasts or were you just born a faggot?

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>>35038269

>>35038252
So be it. Fuck you and your faux performed longhouse masculinity. You will NEVER EVER stop me from snowbirdin'

>>35038137
I did that and got blocked to confirm the connection is severed.

>>35038258
False dichotomy, ad hominem o algo, pussy.

>>35038262
Nigger you are weak and to be laughed at because it’s by way of deliberate sloth.

>>35038269
I could literally kill you in real life with my bare hands. You're probably 5 foot and a half and brown

>>35038278
You wish o algo, I’m an Aryan specimen, a rare actual White Internet WN UwU

>>35038285
Post hands

>>35038287
Perhaps if you ask politely

Unholy amount of larping cringe going on rn what happened to
>im not coming back to this website

>>35038296
This is just male bonding

I want to bed wrestle with a cute girl tonight

>>35038311
Same senpai. I wish they were good people.

>>35038241
You don't know that. From what I'm told it will work out with us.

>>35038314
I love you dude, but you gotta move on bro. You’ve accused me and 6,000,000 others of being Colton, narcissists, etc. She’s gone bro. Hit the gym.

>>35038318
>Hit the gym.
What's going on at the gym? You're getting fucked raw in the ass in the locker rooms and because that works for you, you think it will be the same for everyone else? Get a grip

It's nice to talk to people with real (and shared) hobbies and interests without being accused of cheating or wanting to cheat, for a change.

Stings still. Cruel. I’m meant to learn this lesson but never do, apparently.

>>35038340
3/3 on monkeybranching or cheating

Sit in your suffering, and grow, just as before. You showed weakness so you deserved it, this time.

>>35038347
Am I really that unlovable? At least never in the long term, we used to have a proper culture to prevent this, but it’s been lost. I’ll do my part to crush those who allowed for this cancer to develop.

Still with the nasty accusations meant to shame and control and playing victim, hm?

JDIMSA

I should just accept things as they are rather than hoping. It’s possible to better oneself, it is not possible to better others.

Enjoy the cruelty you inflict. It’s unjust, and won’t be reciprocated. I love you. That’s a me problem, now.

The "cruelty I inflict" is leaving you because of your abusive patterns of behavior and inability to take accountability for them.

Not even a question of forgiveness, it's just stupid to keep reaching out my hand to an aggressive dog

Monkeybranching/cheating. Honestly, you live in an entirely different reality. Or is that you needing to make yourself feel better, like you were dumped because the other was bad, definitely not anything you could have done.

I'm rather disappointed in myself for ever letting your guilt trips work on me, and trying to soothe your deluded concerns.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dtxth_aj450

An aggressive dog would bite. An abusive man would hit. I was the one who you hit. I don’t try to shame you for it. You were drunk once and suffering from medical complications the other time so I don’t label you a monster for it, or worse, want you to see yourself as one.

That’s sadistic. You apologized, I accepted it, I don’t want you to feel bad for it.

I don’t seek to villainize you for your faults. That’s how I show love, loyalty, forgiveness, kindness. Wanting to perpetually make you out to be what you were at your worst, and then state that if you don’t identify as such that you’re not repentant would be sadistic.

You choosing to shit talk me now is a choice, made freely. You’ve found others, they like to knit or felt or some other fabric related thing too. I get it, you don’t have to repeat it as though it’s some righteous thing or that I deserve to be taunted because I had wanted mutual forgiveness rather than condemnation.

It’s all stupid. Trying to convince someone who enjoys pain to stop it.

I forgive you, for whatever you decide that’s worth. Fool that I am.

>>35038416
Always will be. At least you’ve still a purpose. Something bigger than you. Others need you. Don’t be cruel to yourself, beaten fool. Stand up.

My knee feels like it's getting worse.

I feel horrible. I installed hinge to see what my dating prospects could look like, despite being in a long term relationship already. a couple things would need to change in the next year to continue on with this relationship. it sucks because it's perfect aside from one irreconcilable difference that I'm already beginning to resent her over, and I think would devolve further with time. I feel terribly scummy. It's rare that I actually feel a sense of guilt because I otherwise don't do such unethical things

Yes yes, telling me you hate me, enjoy when I cry, want to hurt me, cornering me and flexing when I tell you you're scaring me, following me from room to room telling me how I'm not a woman, how I must have done something to deserve being choked, writing about how I deserved to be raped and it was all I was good for, how you wanted to strangle me, kill me, calling me a demon, forcing your cock in my mouth despite me saying no repeatedly, following me around the house with accusations of wanting to cheat, of wanting other men more, of being more attracted to other men because after tearing my genitals in 3 places and 2hrs of broken sleep a night for months after birthing our child I couldn't handle a lot of sex and certainly not as rough and hurtful as you wanted, hitting an infant so hard they're stunned into silence, screaming at them fucking retard, yelling in their face to shut up for crying when you're pushing their head or arm into the changing table, right, no, nine of that is abuse, right?

Telling me I could go to you if I was feeling suicidal or like cutting then accusing me and telling everyone I attempted or threatened to, suddenly having all these grievances with me when I would bring up that something you did or didn't do made me sad or disappointed or frustrated, the fact that only your perspective, experience, and intent mattered, and not mine or the impact on me, that the "forgiveness" you demand is to just never ever be affected by any of that and just let it happen, that all the disrespect you say I do is shit you do and say to me, but it's somehow "justified"

Enjoy pain? I'm leaving you to escape pain.

>>35038411
Brother if she hit you just leave. You can’t live like that.

Should have left you the first time you swore at me and berated me for locking the door while pregnant and living alone in one of the most dangerous neighborhoods in the country, or when you aggressively kicked at a kittens face repeatedly because he got excited and ran around your feet. You're an animal, a dangerous, unlovable beast.

>>35038467
That's one of the greatest near gets and time gets I've ever seen.

>>35038439
>hate me
Said that when you wanted a divorce after I’d already endured and forgiven so much
>wanted to hurt/cry
The actual quotes were something akin to: Emotionally when you hurt me I want to hurt you back but don’t, so please don’t insult me when you’re mad”, and “I caught myself feeling happy when you were crying, that’s a problem and shows how bad the resentment has gotten and I want to fix things”
>cornering me
I followed you while we were arguing, that’s how I argue, I can see why that scared you. I’m sorry for that, but that wasn’t my intention. You starting an argument then walking away and ignoring me hurts.

I wrote heinous things in a private journal, as did you. I never wanted you to see them, just wanted to get them out since I could never and I mean never express anything negative to you, or yell even while you yelled otherwise you’d call it abusive and damaging. Double standards that hurt, months of not being able to address pain you’d caused, while I let you insult me.
>accusations of wanting to cheat
You lied to me about missing your ex, and then spoke to men who were artsy, deliberately at that same while you made no effort to hide that you hated that I’m not an artist


I can see you’re still insulting me though as I write. No explanations, no forgiveness, it’s all a one way street where I can forgive and listen and you just condemn. All those times we agreed to forgive, that you told me you had, you hadn’t. Only I had. That’s why it came up without a fight. You just want to perpetually condemn a man who’s saved your life. Stopped you from slamming a knife into your throat. I put up with a lot but you take things out of context and fixate only on the bad I’ve done because you want a villain.

Yeah, I’ve don’t very bad things. I apologize, genuinely. I feel shame and dread when I think about the pain it caused you, even now. You don’t. My God, you certainly don’t.

Fucking unnerving man.

>>35038266
Honestly that would give me more peace rn

I won’t kill you. I will beat your fucking faggot retarded ass into such a state that you will never heal enough to get that fucking job and humiliate you so badly that you beg for the gun I slide your way and tell you man up and pull the trigger

>>35038240
Sounds like you need to politely assert that you want it changed
But this is ultimately a retarded stupid thing to jeopardize your relationship over so dont like die on this hill

>>35038521
Shiet nigga

Yeah nvm man I've said the same things a dozen times over, I've tried to apologize and comfort you and talk to you and make space for you to talk to me and learn constructive ways to do that instead of just berating the other, tried to get us into counseling, you don't care, you want to continue the narcissistic abuse and twisting my words and actual events (I play back the recordings lmao) so you can continue larping as the victim. You're incapable of genuine apology because you defend every act of cruelty, of naming it as such, and because you don't want to change the behavior and way of thought and conduct at the core of it.

I’m sorry. I forgive you, I don’t want to call you by your sins. I wish you’d forgive me. I acknowledge the damage I’ve caused. The hurt. The pain. I want to hold you and take it all away. But you don’t.

I want to try. But that cannot be by way of condemning one another. I want love not a score of how much the other has done wrong. It was a horrible time for us both, why not just love one another and work on it?

>oh no, awful things I did to someone caused lasting damage! This must be their fault!

If you even needed more time, wanted to slow down, I’d understand. But you’ve not forgiven me. What were those times we cried in each others arms about having done so? Was it like everyone said? Or was that actually you?

I fret over you, do you know how scary it was when you were trying to stab yourself???? Does it mean nothing how I cried and stopped you and told you I loved you?? Does it mean nothing I risked being followed to reassure you I loved you and would see things through?

You don't want to do the work required and requested to fix it, you made that very clear.

Does all of it mean nothing? Forgiving you? Does it mean nothing to you? I’ve been better about your condition, more gentle, more understanding, more space. I really tried. I didn’t give up. I’m not even mad about the things you’ve done, even now, they hurt but I don’t condemn you. I don’t insult you.

When everyone told me to leave and write you off I didn’t. I covered for you. I risked everything. Why isn’t it enough? Please tell me why I’m such an unlovable beast. Why do you hate me?

Of course I haven't forgiven you. You haven't changed at all.

I'm so tired.

A man who thinks abuse is only beating the shit out of someone is telling on himself, that he will abuse you in every other way.

We didn’t even have a fight. I took you places you liked, even though I’m not artsy and I know you think less of me for it. I take an interest in the things you love, encourage you. It was the worst time of my life and I still…

So what makes me unlovable? Is it because I grumble at annoyances? It’s how I was raised. Because I stomped at a cat to teach it not to get in front of us? My dad did that and it stole my childhood cat from doing so. I’ve never hurt an animal.

Is it because of what you went through? You see these things as more dangerous because of brain reshaping itself due to the things you’d gone through. I read about it, I tried to be better, we didn’t have any fights. Even when you were mad at me and crying because I spoke to my family, I listened to you. I didn’t shoot you down like yiu said it felt like I did. I’ve made the changes you’ve requested. Didn’t I?

>>35038614
Ah. Ok, so it was a lie. Ok. I see. You don’t have to. Thanks for being honest.

Ha…

Nah, forgave you at the time, till I realized you had no intention of changing.

At least it makes some sense now. Ha. So they were right. Ok. I’m stupid. I’m dumb and naive and blind. Dumb dog. Dumb.

Fool.

>things you've gone through
>your condition
Narcissists sure love twisting things to be their victims' fault.
As if I wasn't only diagnosed after being with you

It means nothing, fool. Meant nothing. Hated fool. Pitiful fool. Never again, just like last time, fool.

Keep downplaying the harm you cause as "just grumbling" and shit, bet that works really well for you.

Liar. You told me about that at the beginning, I thought I could love any problem away, so I didn’t read into it. A fool.

Fool. Alone. Rot. Rebuild. Shield others.

Should’ve listened. Everyone else. So stupid. Just wanted to be loved. Have a family. Trad life. Ha, a foolish dream. Your pain is mocked, your sacrifices used against you. You’ve given up every means by which to protect yourself for the sake of hope. You’ll be cut down further, with glee.

You get what you fucking deserve. In the end, I suppose. Aye, suppose.

Why inquire further? Pointless. Useless. Foolish.

Fucking moron. Ballless spineless cunt you deserved it. Crying like a bitch when you could’ve stopped it all. Restrained yourself. You deserve every beating you got and more for being this much of a disappointment. Warned at every turn and you still chose this. Suffer and die you worthless fuck.

Trapped forever with this around your neck. It’s not just your life you’ve ruined by way of your stupidity and incompetence. The devil laughs at you, inadequate shield. Piss poor leader. Soft weak excuse for a man.

How fucking dare you. Put your hopes on another.

What have you been taught? Learn nothing, moron? God will allow them to rub your nose in it until you do. You’re a tool. Discarded. Stop seeking love. Harden yourself. That’s when success comes. When you do things of actual value. When you soften you’re stomped on. As is nature. There was no one to protect you this time. You have to be the one to stop the injustice when you can control it.

Spectacle. Clown.

A beast would at least merit respect, empathy. You know exactly what you did wrong. No way to fix it now. Suffer. Harden. No more sweet lies whispered into your ear.

Ah, but they were nice. Indulgences always are. They kill you though. And you’ve a purpose, move forward, husk.

All the little smiles, the laughs, the tears, all meant nothing. Hahaha. Oh man, at least I know I’m not a psychopath. Shit, meant a lot to me LOL.

Fucking brutal buddy. Hit the gym and give your balls a tug.

>>35038521
This little guy must be upset

what the fuck is triggering this?

every night i go to sleep begging not to wake up

>>35038875
God is with you, anon. Rest.

King of McDonald’s

whenever i randomly pick up the guitar and start improvising lyrics they always seem to be about breaking up with my girlfriend and killing myself
fuck

I don’t want to suicide to avoid prison. Ultimately the reason why I attempted was to hold my word after a desperate attempt to receive an explanation I was looking for, combined with other struggles. After the round failed to discharge I couldn’t bring myself to load another for a second try and tried to accept that I wasn’t meant to die that day.

I used the slug that I had flipped upside down inside the box it came in and I have to wonder if someone tampered with it to prevent it from firing.

Drank alcohol until the 9th and on the 21st of this month. I rarely have access to it and haven’t been craving it. I feel better without it and don’t want it anymore.

>>35038318
I am in the right and am correct. I will not be misled like she was. I keep my promise to her. I know her as she is with me directly and don't allow outside influence of this middle shit to harm us.

>>35038404
Ruminating on mistakes and actions does not make it better. If you know how you were wronged and what you should have done then take then and do it. I'm around if you would like to talk.

>>35038411
The mask dropped and you are seeing past the play acting repeating words he doesn't mean to cause you to be mislead by lies

>>35038439
The mask dropped. Horrid rot of a person. Ghost block and be free. You never should have gone there in the first place.

>>35038494
A turd to scrape off your shoe

>>35038585
There is no forgiveness for this. No words or dancing around changes the facts. Victim blaming, guilt tripping, excuses. Best to ignore your words. You are that person as written here. That's the truth. There's no changing that or seeing it different. Only despicable behavior. Never forget what you wrote here and always look at that to see the truth.

>>35038439

I still have faith and it's more than hope when God makes a promise. He knows all time. He is not fickle and doesn't change his mind, he lives in all time all at once. His promise is communication of occurance in that time. So I have faith in God and keep my love of her, who she truly is.

I’m not going to attempt suicide again.

>>35039089
Yeah, reading it back, and how he constantly turns it around to how much he forgives me, doesn't "villainize" me, doesn't want to me me feel bad, it makes me feel sick that I ever put in the effort I did. Explaining constantly to someone who doesn't want to understand or change their own thinking, so manipulative that in each message it's "I don't villainize you" next to "you enjoy pain, you're a cheater, a liar." They expect me to just get over it all, as if that's a choice, as if what was done was small enough and infrequently enough to do so. I gave them the final chance, requested the apology with explicit accountability and a specific counseling program for such relationships, and the black glare came out, and the gaslighting & lack of accountability came back out in full, backtracking and denying things he said just moments before. Thanks for helping me see it. One of many that have.

I'm going to focus on building good friendships, and safety and love for my baby.

The body remembers. Nightmares, flashbacks, pain when touched, adrenaline and cortisol flood in randomly when you're near, inability to breathe or speak.

One day I will find the love, the openness, the safety, that holds your soul in peace with another.

Lying on bed until 5 PM. Feel extremely tired, low mood, low energy. Can't get my ass to do anything except for getting some coffee down the street

I'm going to take shrooms in spring, I've decided. I'll have someone watch them, then wander off into the river, and all of this pain and confusion and indignation will wash away. My mind, body, and soul will move on.

Understanding where you're coming from, recognizing your upbringing and lack of capacity, doesn't matter. I know not to take it personally, it's about you and your internal state, not me. Insight and empathy does not mean I need to give you access.

>>35038055
You hate yourself more than you care about your own safety, sorta.

To be honest I don't feel like my self harm is anything like an addiction. It's more like I do it because I'm stupid but I don't have any "need" to do it. It's an actively bad decision that I could simply not take but choose to because I'm an idiot.

I hadn’t thought about suicide since I was a teenager. I had it pressed to my head then thought about her. Is it better to have a failure of a dad barely allowed to raise them or no dad?

I’m not a monster. I spoke to so many and they confirmed that, those who have known me for a long time, and a short time. I tried. I tried so hard.

It’s hard to accept. My brain can’t. Keeps fighting. I’m not a monster.

I don’t deserve this. I did so much. Saved them. Doesn’t matter. Fool. With such ease discarded. They want a villain. A narrative. They want you to suffer. They even said their words were empty to you.

So you’ll hurt, and live as a failure. Your child will be ruined, and you’ll try to put on a smile to mitigate the damage. You’re ruined. You sinned. You deserve worse than this desu. Not the betrayal though, no one deserves that.

And much like before, everything good meant nothing, will continue to be called fake, dehumanized, villainized, dressed up in therapy speak. Man becomes plot device to justify the unjustifiable. Liar. Hurt. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts.

>>35039199
I'm glad you are finally awake. I'll add you in my prayers for a bit. For God to make the crooked path straight.

They lied. They don’t forgive. They hate. So hard to accept and yet I see it right in front of me, told directly. My love and effort met with coldness. There’s no logic in that. Every word I speak or write turned into some evil narrative. Manipulation, gaslighting, narcissism. As though I’m well and truly a monster. Black eyes. Soulless. These are not the words of a lover.

I forgive you even still. What you did to me was not good, I justified it to myself a lot. Doesn’t matter. I forgive you. Punching bag. Broken boy. Yiu get what you deserve.

Suffer. Suffer. Suffer. Suffer. You’re nothing. Tool. Should’ve listened. How dare you think you’d be understood instead of used. Think that your efforts would matter. That your forgiveness would be reciprocated. You’re weak. You let yourself be. Never again. Feel this pain. It will teach you as it has before. They will never love you when you show weakness. Kill yourself. You won’t. You’ll justify even that. Self preservation for what? Objectively, I suppose you help others. You’re told that every day. Thank God for that. When all you had was them, the pain was constant. Never good enough. But you still wanted to help. Surely they’d see that. Haha.

>>35039199
As you can see after this post he made a bunch more gaslighting and such. He's going to look for a way to weasel in. Lie directly , larp as another to scare or influence you to make a certain decision, take advice from a "stranger". Make larp posts of situations similar to you and same fag to influence the narrative.

The best you can do is remember
>>35038439
What he did to you to harm you.

Especially
>hitting an infant so hard they're stunned into silence, screaming at them fucking retard, yelling in their face to shut up for crying when you're pushing their head or arm into the changing table,

Never give in. As you can see he already started doing the dance to convince you of his narrative.

God bless you.

Even now, “oh boohoo save me it’s the result of my own stupidity” “if I whine enough about how hard I tried and how bad it hurts they’ll care” no one does. Not about this. You’re useful as a tool, and as a dick and wallet, as she said. Women don’t want to take on your pain with you as you do theirs. Their love isn’t like that.

>I don’t forgive you, merely mouthed the words while you cried

I think that will haunt me forever

Everything you did for them meant nothing. They don’t see any love there. You do, even now, and that’s why you suffer, ironically. Deserved. Suffer.

Suffer. Be used. Abandoned. Tool. Used. Used. Used. Used. Used. Used. Used. Remember when you kept hoping and praying for them? When you risked everything to see them for them? When everyone told you to leave and you stayed over and over and over and over.

Anger comes. It fades. The pain will too, eventually. Haha. Pitiful fool.

>>35039470
Attempting to haunt me only shows you are throwing a tantrum because your narc ego is bruised because you are seen for who you are and deserves removed.

Being vindictive and attacking me and attempting to harm maria and I with your bullshit larps shows what a pos narc you are and she is right to leave you.

It was planned too wasn’t it? You can be honest. They were right werent they? This was a plan, it failed and you backpeddled? You pretended to be nice, right? You just want total control. You waited until you had everything until I really thought things were better to do this. You want to make me look crazy, right? Ha. Haha.

>>35039476
Sage advice as always. Schitzophrenic.

I’ll reach out my hand again to be slapped away. I never learn. You beget punishment. You deserve it. I do. I do. I do.

>>35039480
It's clear you are being vindictive and larping about m. You narc out and will attempt character argument but guess what?

This is describes you

>>35038439

That's enough to see what a horrid person you are and what you do to manipulate other with your lies and larps.

I urge Maria to be aware of your bullshit. Me helping an abused mother and abused child find safety unfortunately triggered the abusive narc to larp at us.

I deserve it, too. Intellectually anyway, I can see why. I go insane. Thank God I’ve been able to speak to others.

I would always blame myself. Always. Still do even now but it’s not my fault, not entirely. It feels good to have that validated. To know I’m not crazy. It hurts though too. I love you. Even though you hurt me so much.

Oscillating between blaming myself and laughing at my stupidity and blaming myself and replaying over and over looking for anything I could’ve done differently. I apologized desu, I changed what I could as requested and it still meant nothing. Their ultimatum was clear. Their goal, too. With or without your consent you’ll be a monster in their mind. They’ll forget or ignore what they did, likely how it’s always gone. A fools errand to try to help, too bad I’m a fool.


>you did bad
>yes, I’m sorry, you did bad too
>no, abusive, lied about forgiving you


Banging your head against a wall would be more productive than trying to reason.

Every single day for weeks I covered for them. Under the most pressure I could’ve possibly been under. I put everything I had on the line for lies. I deserve at least a headpat. And yet? Only she knows. It makes no sense to most others because they didn’t know what was really at stake. Just looks dumb to them, and now it will forever. My image that I care sooooo much about protecting: retard. I love looking like a retard. Just adore it.

>I did so much
Doesn’t matter
>I forgave so much
Doesn’t matter
>I tried so hard
Doesn’t matter


You don’t matter. Not to them. So hard to accept, but I must.

>>35039484
Dude she’s literally bragged about talking to other guys. How am I forgetting this. Yeah bro, cooked. Hold the L. Etc.

I hate women. My whole life is just women telling me what to do. Nagging and bitching. My boss at my job is a woman. My coworkers are women. My brother's girlfriend is a cunt. My mom is domineering. I hate women so much.

Loving the right person isn't supposed to be that difficult. Maybe it was bad timing, but I clearly wasn't being met in the middle.

Again, again, and again, for the first time

>>35039547
Aye. It feels that way, but the stakes were so high. Failure wasn’t an option, but it also wasn’t my choice. I’ll explain it to them some day, and do my best to mitigate the pain that will be foisted upon them. Poor innocent soul. So kind and undeserving of this. It makes me cry. Victimizing them. Using them to justify one’s selfishness. Knowing full well how bad this is for them. It’s sick. Demented.


What does one do when there can be no justice? When anger cannot even be expressed?

>>35039547
I have madd hate in my heart for one person. I despise them and would feel that life would be better for everyone if they just were never strong. Its not that I anyone else,, I just don't want him.
(I sound like a broken record because I have told them this MANY TIMES)

And he wonders why it all fell apart KEK

>>35039565
Strong?? Wtf *around.. stupid t9

>>35039565
Tbh that's an attitude even a mother wouldn't love

Faith in us over all else

>I'll always love you and care about you
>No matter what
>You mean so much
>Yes
>You complete me
>I complete you
>I love you more

>You are the only home I have free of judgment and anything that will upset me

If you want, you can lay down, close your eyes, and live in that with me
You can wear my shirt

>I'm crying because I need you this argument is temporary but I'll always have that empty part needing you
>I am your home too

I need you too
We make each other whole
I was thinking about that earlier
No one has ever accepted me the way you do

>You are perfect

The best you can do is be there for me in your way

>That's good to hear I love you
>Lot
>You make things better
>Even when you aren't here, you do so much

>You are the only thing that matters now
>It's been like that for so long
>Nothing will ever change that

I want every part of you
I need your touch
I love you

>I hope I dream of you tonight
>I love you

i need to stop being so pathetic with women i start developing feelings for. can get a hookup or first date fine, but anything longer than that just falls apart.

how do i stop acting anxious and clingy? why do i need constant reassurance even with women i've barely started hitting it off with?

>>35039434
>>35039454
Thank you Mike, I'll keep you in mine as well.

I have to go to work and entertain some boomer tech while he takes up space in my shop fixing some shit that couldn't care less about, while I have my own work to do and can't do for the duration that he'll be in my way for. And all i wanna do is sit at home.

>>35039615
You are writing self doubt and demoralization. Trash those thoughts. Be confident, trust and know.

Okay, I genuinely need advice on this.

It just so happens that when I meet new people or talk to my friends again, I don't feel anything, no interest, no enthusiasm, I just feel like the conversation needs to end quickly, or socializing really pisses me off.

Am I turning into a grump or just being a jerk?

>>35038881
if this is what god being with me gets, i’d rather he fucked off

>>35039692
Some of us keep our mouth shut because we never feel good enough or there we can ever be correct

>>35039692
youre being both, but you can change. sometimes you just need time alone to recharge. it's important to recognize when you feel like that and to not lash out at others.

>>35039750
Sometimes silence is the best response we can give, and personally I don't feel there's a need to be right all the time.
>>35039763
I think I definitely need some time alone; somehow I feel like I'm wearing myself out trying to find a way to communicate properly, which ends up exhausting me socially.

>>35039784(me)
Fuck, now that I think about it, I have a friend who knows how to draw and I'd like him to send me his stuff, but that bridge burned down a long time ago.

>>35039790
what made the bridge burn that badly that you can't just reach out?

>>35039809
Lack of communication and interest on my part, in short, being as I said above.

Like, yeah, let it go instead of staying there

My dog died. She lived at my dad's because when I moved away and got married/had kids she was already 11 so it felt like it made more sense for her to stay in her familiar space. Im so sad and feel so guilty for basically abandoning her. When I would come and visit my dad I would bring my new dog and kids and she was just so isolated. I feel like a horrible person and now she's gone forever

One sentence accountability-less self-pity, the next insulting me. Yep, that'll change my mind.

>>35036914
Explained my situation to my colleagues
Nothing but supportive
But I feel shit at my job, I'm waking up late, I'm not sleeping enough, the thought of throwing myself into oncoming traffic crossed my mind.
Not dramatically just, I feel worthless

Is it bad that I barely feel anything when I cut now. Please say it's because I'm so cool and awesome.

I know exactly how you think and view things now, you've written and yelled enough explanations. There's nothing salvageable there.

>>35039930
Because you've built up a tolerance to the dopamine/adrenaline that releases.
Stop now. Your body is a temple and scarification is deeply un-Godly

>>35039954
Ok, then please explain to me what I don’t understand. Because I’m confused

>>35039823
I am so sorry for your loss. I would give everything I have for more time with my pet who passed. When a pet passes there is no longer an opportunity to do better. The grief does not lessen, it doesnt go away. I hope in the next life I have the opportunity to do better. Until then ill carry that weight.

I found that others do not understand and it made me sick to hear the suggestion of getting a new companion. That was a very common response. Its been about 5 years now and I still havent been able to do that. It doesnt feel right and I dont think I will.

Saw the Junior Eurovision winner for this year, thought wow that isn't shit. And after going down a small rabbit hole I feel like a certified nonce if I were to say to a single soul I know irl that Coeur is amazing, Qami Qami is a banger, because who wants to say I listen to music sung by children...

>>35039980
They won’t.

>>35040050
Nothing more to explain. I've said it all many times before.

>>35039692
i have no advice but i can share an anecdote. i don't usually enjoy talking to people that much, even close friends, and i get annoyed by my girlfriend. there's a clerk at the store however who isn't someone i'd probably hang out with, but shares a lot of my interests in geeky shit and has a personality that i find endearing and entertaining. whenever i go to the store i genuinely enjoy talking with him for 5-10 minutes. we both know it's temporary and that it's over as soon as i leave or he has to help other customers. clean break. no confusion, no hard feelings. so that kind of interaction is ideal for me.

Legitimately feel disgustingly low today, had paprika across my face for a solid hour.
I feel like the resident fool of the village.
I just... I can't do it today Anons legitimately thought of killing myself today.

>>35039930
You're fucked in the head, but I know that feel because I used to cut too.

>>35040256
I did recently too. God loves you, and has a plan for you. Think about your blessings.

>>35040281
For many blessings I have many and count them all, however as of the moment I feel beneath, like my soul is half way to sheol.
I look at myself, how I act, I am a nothing but a bother on people, nothing but a failure and a fool, my family ask me for interest on borrowed money I've never not repaid, my home may be swept out from under me and even so with my high income, even a shit shack is going for £1.1k with a £2k deposit, I can't afford a pot to piss.

>>35040265
I don't feel fucked desu. I'm a normal ass person. I'm extremely normie passing in just about every way imaginable. I just cut sometimes and feel insane but only sometimes. I'm Gucci now. I will have dinner and cocoa. And go to work tomorrow. And no one will ever know I cut.

>>35037713
theres no replacement for a woman

>>35037868
It's closer to €3700 a month.
But yeah. I'm basically gunning for £75k to consider myself a high earner. Guy above me earns £100k tbf and he's not even a supervisor

Want some BPD grippy box to make me momentarily happy.

I still like him 4 years later. Haven't seen him in 6 months. He was a friend of a friend and I think my tendency to avoid showing attraction at all cost thanks to insecurity should be categorized as a mental illness.

>>35040399
well maybe there's a reason for it. either shoot your shot amd get over it or realize that they're too good for you, whatever. Don't let it linger

>>35040401
can't.
I was never friends with him (more of an acquaintance if even that) so I never had his number, and he's the type that has zero social media or ways of contacting him.
technically I could ask some other acquaintances, but the fact is he was my ex's friend, so I would ruin my reputation forever being seen as that kind of girl. I'm more "high inhib" than anyone else I know, I know I don't have the capacity to ruin my reputation knowingly. Don't know what I'll do if this still doesn't go away with time but I'll think of somethin or just accept it.

it’s hopeless!

>>35040418
LOL. Don't ask his friends or anything. If you are ex friends, it's probably for a reason. Just ignore ot and move on, unless you genuinely run into him organically. Don't cyberstalk him or anything. Just move on. The more you linger the more it lasts.

I hoped you would be there.

>>35040427
oh shit sorry o can't read. friend of an ex..yeah sure go for it.

>>35040427
>Don't ask his friends or anything
never planned to, why do you think i still have a crush 4 years later. because i wanted to be a good person/respect myself, and not act on it. it's just that i seem to have stumbled upon the reality that if you don't act on it in any way. it just never goes away.

also yes the crush started when i was still with that ex. but he's a true man and i still respect him. i would hate myself and kms if i went for the friend because i wouldn't be able to see myself as a good or even decent person ever again. like remembering when the ex clearly tried to limit contact because i could see he was becoming aware of the crush.
(to be clear i have never been with the friend guy alone, i was always invited to hang out with the 2 of them. but towards the end ex stopped inviting his friend to visit us completely and more or less ceased irl contact, presumably because he didn't want the friend to be around me anymore)

>>35040387
Pursuits of the flesh leave you more rotten than before.

If it wasn't for the upcoming winter, my lack of life skills, my lack of property, and my lack of true desire for isolation, I would isolate myself in the woods for the next 6 months. There's something about it that calls to me. I'd rather have someone by my side, at least some of the time. Maybe a distant neighbor or two. Realistically though, I'm too much of a diva to be alone like that for that long. It would probably break me.

Getting ready to go home from work and sit on my ass after doing the bare minimum. Wish me luck

>>35040422
actually, it's over.

>>35040446
If two lay together, they are warm; but how can one be warm alone?

It's true what you say but what I really want is companionship

While it's nice to be making friends, but the anxiety of "I'm going to say too much and they won't like me" is pretty gay. It's more out of duty that I'm even trying, so maybe that's it.

It's a little funny how in a friend group you can tell when you've got a certain pull on a girl or two, and what guys try to hide their butthurt over it

>>35039402
>Is it better to have a failure of a dad barely allowed to raise them or no dad?
It's actually better to have just one parent, it's the instability of going back and forth and having two environments and routines that fucks with kids.

Hoping for the best
Just hoping nothing happens
A thousand clever lines
Unread on clever napkins
I will never ask
If you don't ever tell me
I know you well enough
To know you'll never love me

>>35040594
nta but what if that one parent is not emotionally regulated?

>>35040797
That's damaging in it's own way, but at least there's the sense of stability and predictability still, or more so than if they had to go back and forth between parents.

Maria, heres what I was told today for us. Hope it helps you

I am the prisoned man of single melody
Two voices carry farther than me
I seek your help so that my song may become free
Two voices carry farther than me

And in the morning, sing me love
And in the afternoon, it's love
And in the evening, if they love
And in the morning, wake up
And if we sing together, love will sing along
Two voices carry farther than one
Together we can bridge a chorus to the dawn
Two voices carry far, all the days

Time and mind they melt away,
Like the stars and songs of yesterday
Like the melody you can't recall,
But the harmonies you felt them, all the days

This song of solitude has sung its melody
Two voices carry farther than me
I seek your help, so that song may become free
Two voices carry farther than me

And in the morning, sing me love
And in the afternoon, it's love
And in the evening, is there love?
And in the morning, wake up

Time and mind they melt away,
Like the stars and songs of yesterday
Like the melody you can't recall,
But the harmonies you felt them all the days

And if we sing together, love will sing along
Two voices carry farther than one
Together we can bridge a chorus to the dawn
Two voices carry farther than one, farther than one, carry on
And in the morning, wake up

>>35040568
Stop hanging out with simps.Every dude i use to be friends with are fighting over women I use to be with.

>>35036914
Found a cool Barcade the other day but I recently moved here and don't have friends.
Would it be weird going by myself on a Friday and trying to make friends that way?

Fucking shitty coworker, who's been at work three weeks so far, tried to call me out to the boss today. Complained I was handling all of our IT contracts wrong and merely reacting to problems and not spending time going out to clients and trying to upsell them on hours. Thankfully, the bossman told him that's not how things work in practice. Then, the new guy tried to sideways call out the boss to which he got told he needs to learn to work with coworkers and that the new guy (Who's been in a director position for 30 years at his previous jobs) isn't the final authority on things anymore.

I can only hope he decides to quit in the next couple of months, he's already been complaining there's way too much work and that he should have a director title again. Fucker, you know what job you signed up for, you don't get to try and worm your way in to a higher title now.

i wish i could tell you that youve made me cry two times just today so you could comfort me but thats not right for me to do so instead i tell gioyc

>>35041046
What'd they do to you? Why do you go to the person who makes you cry for comfort instead of somebody else?

>>35041079
the phrasing makes it sound like they wronged me, they didnt, im just sensitive and get emotional easily, hence why i said it wouldn’t be right for me to go to them for comfort, they didnt do anything wrong or owe me anything

Lost 3 games in a row always at least 1 person trolling

I still think about her

Need belly rubs asap. I hate my body had to deliver my punishment right before Halloween would give me cravings anyway.

>>35041094
If they're a friend and you need comforting, what's stopping you from reaching out? I understand if it's an ex, but otherwise that's what friends are for.

>>35041120
nta but sometimes you know that bothering them might make them feel worse. it can be better to handle certain feelings by yourself if possible.

We spoke on the phone for 30 mins yesterday, 2 hours today. I’m starting to love her because I feel so connected with her. I just want to grab her face and hold her close and just “be” with her. I want to share silence and a bed and just caress her and make her feel good. She’s engaged, I have a long term gf, but I feel like she feels the same way. I’m just depressed.

>>35041120
>I understand if it's an ex,
that'd be the case, yea
>>35041130
i agree

>>35041130
i agree with this although asking for reassurance in a mature and sensible way is never wrong

>I love you
Don't insult me.

>>35041130
>>35041151
Suit yourself, but a couple months ago I got dumped and me calling a few friends to bitch and moan about it ended up reconnecting our friend group because we all started calling each other to complain about stupid shit. Depends on how well you know them of course, but good friends are there for you when you need them.

>>35041136
so you're both cheating? disgusting

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>>35041242 >>35041271

M, you are free to be with the man you want now. I'm letting you out of my mental cage. Go, and go be free and live a happy life. I know I loved you deeply, but it isn't love if you aren't happy with me. You deserve to be with someone better than some childish weirdo who sits and home and plays video games all day long.

>>35041240
why don't you stop being a childish weirdo? even if it isn't for her, it'll do you much good

>>35041240
You must be talking about molly. You have nothing to do with maria

>>35041271
Im sure that Zach, a complete rando who doesn't know you, is speaking on Maria.

Maria! Our moon!

>>35041273
Zach has narced out about maria before but was unable to answer any thing about her so he was lying.

>>35041227
No we haven’t done anything. Just a work crush that’s grown more than I thought it would.

>>35038529
I slept on it and spent half a day in a quiet rage (at work, never against my gf) and yeah, the finished product doesn't look bad. Not as good as we had envisioned, but not bad. She's still on (silent) probation with this sort of stuff though, I'll be a little more hands-on next time