Previous thread >>>34973462What is /htdg/? How to Date General is by anons, for anons, about the modern dating landscape. So bring all of your questions about dating here. Some anons on this site actually get partners and laid, and some of them even want to help. If you're trying to meet and date people, then this is the place to ask questions, seek advice, and share experiences. We know how hard it can be. We got you bro. >What is /htdg/ not? These threads are NOT for whining, moping, incels, femlcels, MGTOW, hopelessness, pinkpillers or demoralization. We're all aware that meeting and dating people is hard today, and even harder for some, but /htdg/ is for trying to overcome the challenges. IGNORE the posters who complain, give up, or insist there's nothing they can do. This site has other boards and threads that they can pollute. BE SMART: Spot the bait, don't reply, and DON'T WASTE TIME ARGUING WITH THEM! >How to ask for advice Context is important: be more specific than "I got ghosted, why?" We can't help if we don't know the situation, so try to provide as much (useful) info as possible ("I was at the bar, someone was checking me out..."). What's your relationship with them? How long have you known them? Any conversation screenshots? Etc... Don't forget to ask an actual question. >Resources and Books https://wingman.live/ (AI dating coach) https://www.youtube.com/@HealthyGamerGG https://www.youtube.com/@YourWingmam https://pdfcoffee.com/318797392-mark-manson-models-2016pdf-4-pdf-free.html https://archive.org/details/robert-glover-no-more-mr-nice-guy-id-353324692-size-612 https://www.doctornerdlove.com/blog/ https://www.fantasticanachronism.com/p/how-to-be-good-at-dating REMEMBER: It's good to read and prepare, but don't overdo it. Get off this site: go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual people in the real world.
Additional videos to watch and reflect. Good starter videos>Why We Shouldn't Leave Incels Behindhttps://youtu.be/xHmDJyVT3g0?si=GEUm2HAZ-I6QpLgY>How To Get A Girlfriendhttps://youtu.be/05tG47pv1vM?si=x6Ngo0hvj7M9L1wn>Dr. K Breaks Down The Science of Flirtinghttps://www.youtube.com/live/0k3YUL3iQds?si=OvrpJ6ZNK0je7Ybq>How To ACTUALLY Find The Right Person For Youhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iSfuHwENzXM>Why Your Tinder Match Isn't Going To Date Youhttps://youtu.be/KJX-8C7OHmw?si=5HcbRpJbUa7PE-gO More for Men>Why You Should NEVER Confess Your Lovehttps://youtu.be/xHkcIRZa6lo?si=zGxmCIXyHEAbsXdQ>Can Men & Women Be Friends?https://youtu.be/OafdDpFjOIg?si=O4SIMEOF5EzBFKN7>The Interesting Truth About What Women Need Today & How To Get What YOU Want!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2mD6_g3xpk>5 Harsh Realities About Women | Every Man MUST Face Alone!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tkhLybpZKzI More for women>10 Brutal Dating Tips for Women That Women Need to Hear | And Men Need to Share!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YCMKgpl7HW4>Why You're The Least Valuable Friendhttps://youtu.be/ql5sWIEAcFw?si=lYx6LPTx8xaaS7OM>Why Women Can't Find A Soulmatehttps://youtu.be/58kdlgKvEU0?si=ZskCXZLFY1iMmbpF>A Perspective on Female Lonelinesshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UbGZaGzWdfs Extras>How Your Brain Perceives Love When You Have Autismhttps://youtu.be/KlSsI2CKYaQ?si=1XYAjx97G9oeNeS_>Men Are Getting This Totally Wrong About Being A Simp or Nice Guy!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bn-U2Sx4spo>The Addiction Women Can't Talk Abouthttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDv-bX7Pegg>Your Standards Are Way Higher Than They Should Behttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diIc5e2RLKI>"Why Women Deserve Less": Myron Gaines Loves Projection & Bad Mathhttps://youtu.be/u6QcjXub8fo?si=6TaYexKVRHBncmOm>Why 40% Of Young Men Need Erectile Retraininghttps://youtu.be/2MwTDoT8q_A?si=C-7aytPOjXwgOuIX
You know that stereotype that women have of the 30 year old guy who they dated when they were 15, and they realise when they're much older how much of a loser he was? Well how do those guys get access to those girls and get to date them?
>>35028468If a 30yr old can't outwit a 15 yr old...
>>35028468Start hanging around 15 year olds I guess.
>>35028468While there are obviously 30+yr guys who creep and lurk for those girls, sometimes the girls actually seek out the older guys, lying about their age and attentionwhoring on the internet.That is what happened to me as a self-admitted 30 year old loser guy.
I'd like to start dating, but I feel held back by the fact that literally everyone, including all of my family, has told me never to bother with dating or marrying or starting a family, etc.I know in my mind 'now' that this was all bullshit, but whether I heard all this from people because I'm extraordinarily ugly and/or autistic, or because all these people happened to be rat fucks, I don't knowHow to take the appropriate steps when all of my personal experience has been negative
>>35031238>but I feel held back by the fact that literally everyone>by the fact that literally everyone>literally everyoneThis is black and white thinking anon.You have not been held back by literally everyone. Deep down you know this. Those people who are holding you back, getting rid of them is the first step. Maybe not LITERALLY getting rid of them, but understand that those people are not everyone in the world and that you do not need to listen or believe what they say.You need to surround yourself with people who will make you a better person. People who encourage you to try things, support you when you fail and are down, aren't stagnate and unwilling to change as well.If they aren't making your life better or want to cultivate positivity then just leave them behind.Once you do that, just go do what you want. Don't be scared about failing or looking like a fool. Those people are bullies who are to scared themselves and just want to drag you down so they feel better about doing what they themselves are too scared and ignorant to do.>Can people even change?https://youtu.be/u7BBdM0SKgQ?si=iFAg_OIIf3BcQviL>Can You 'Change' Your Personality? https://youtu.be/2zOe9Kd2n-w?si=Nx6E_SEDF6JhsPuT>When to Change vs Accept Who You Are https://youtu.be/iflcK39wJ2M?si=Q7M_yjy0TFjhpkt4>Is It Too Late To Start Your Life Over? https://youtu.be/TATiapf0tF4?si=YNnJwkkHkzRLwZq9
>>35031238I'm going to assume you're telling the truth.Wow that sucks. Everyone doesn't include yourself. You don't have to hold yourself back.>How to take the appropriate steps Do literally the opposite of what you've been told (including understanding the difference between literally and liberally"
>go to an event with a mix of men and women>end up connecting with the guys>don't approach any woman unless they work there or are friends with someone I know>every time I try to change and start approaching (female)strangers again I feel like I'm either gonna boost their ego or seem desperate because I actually approached them out of the blue>leave event with just a bunch of contacts from dudes>repeatI understand I'm the problem here, but I can't help but be compelled to ignore women because I don't want to be caught lacking. I don't want to boost the ego of some cunt who will just take my attempts at building a conversation and just walk away, or seem like I'm talking to her because I'm trying to talk to more women. I've done this enough times to be sick of it. Like I'm at a stage where I don't need to have a girl but I would like to have one. In the past it just happened naturally but now I have to put myself in this losing position every time I talk to a girl and she can just pull the plug whenever she feels like it.I know it's flawed thinking but I can't get this thought out of my mind that every time I approach a girl and she puts her guard up that she thinks I want something and I see her testing me as if I'm a hungry peasant performing for a few crumbs of her attention. I don't want to do this shit but fuck. My buddy actually noticed this and was perplexed that I ended up just talking to guys and not any women.So I'm asking for help on how to untangle this thought.
>>35031679What's wrong with boosting the ego of some cunt?
>>35031771Interesting questionMy answer is that I don't want to do that because I don't want to imagine her later on bragging about being approached to her friends but presenting it as "this weird guy approached me hahaha isn't that weird you guys?" while she's feeling proud on the inside
>>35031679Ime women are usually pretty open and receptive if you do approach them
How many people should you go to a bar with and should you ever sit at a table if you want to attract women? Whenever I go in a group with 5 of my friends, we get a table and there’s no play but desu I only want to go to a bar to talk to women. If we’re all just going to drink, idk why we don’t do that at someone’s apartment
>>35033093That is the question. What's wrong with that?
>>35031679Warm approaches IRL are way different than an offline or cold approach. The expectation is that guys will shoot their shot.
>>35031679brother you SHOULD want them to test you, cause if they don't, there's probably a hardware problem (mental illness). If things go REALLY well from the get go, she will actually smile right away and be receptive, but eventually, there SHOULD be some shit tests, even if only minor. If there wouldn't, there's literally something wrong with her biology. The ability to maneuver through that is what sets apart retards from achievers and sex havers / successful relationship havers.And yes, they can pull the plug whenever, wha's wrong with that? You are the guy here, you can simply create an agenda of your own will and exert it - aka "I'm going to talk to hot women" and no one can change that. You have incredible freedom, compared to most normies and all of women. It is literally your privilege to choose the people you talk to and give yourself a genuine shot in life.
>>35033093Stop imaging her doing that then. If she's gonna be a cunt then why give a shit?>But but but I don't want people making fun of me! I don't want to be cringeLiterally get over it. It's not the end of the world and taking rejection in stride shows maturity which real women want.
>>35028220Don't forget to sanitize your Youtube links.The "?si=" and everything after it is a tracker Youtube uses to track who you share videos with. It can be safely deleted without breaking the link.https://youtu.be/xHmDJyVT3g0
From a third persons pespective, how obvious is it/what are the signs, two people in a friend group have caught feelings for each other?
my crush and her boyfriend of 2 years are having 'problems' arguing a lot etc mainly because he's a dick. She told me she considers ending things with him. How can i accelerate this breakup and take his place? Im quite close to her (not friendzoned).
>>35040556You don't, cause if she catches the FAINTEST wind of you trying to pull strings it's completely over for you, let shit run it's course and have zero influence over it
>start dating girl I work with but don't see very often>first date the week before last goes well>second date last Friday goes good too>Netflix and chill last Sunday>asked me to pay her rent ($950) just nowThat's a big ask so soon. Is this exactly what it looks like? I wouldn't give someone I met through an app the benefit of the doubt but I kinda knew this girl even before we started seeing each other and if she was faking it to get on my good side she did a pretty good job.
>>35041605That's exactly what it looks like lmao
Is this salvageable? I sent $1500 to my online girlfriend and she gave it to another man and went shopping while holding his arm. She also said that he's taller than me and that I'll never be a real man. WTF?I know most guys would leave a woman instantly if she did this, but I'm a Capricorn. Capricorns don't ditch their soulmates...
>>35041765Bait
>>35041605You should honestly slap her.
>>35040556Assuming you actually like her and aren't just wanting pure sex, just being nice to her and giving her support will do the trick. She's leaving her bf because he's a piece of shit, so don't be a piece of shit.
>>35040455Is it just the si= part?
