When I first played Max Payne I thought painkillers were just an invention of the game
>>12890290That motherfucker was popping 75 bottles of aspiring per hour.
>>12890290I thought Painkiller wasFaster than a bulletTerrifying screamEnraged and full of angerHe's half man and half machine
I didn't understand the concept of cover in shooters until my late teens. I just charged in guns blazing trying to kill everyone at once.
>>12890318Was definitely not aspirin. Aspirin doesn't come in prescription bottles. Probably something like codeine.
>master using it and you can have thisi thought master was used as a noun, not a verb. so i thought the old man was trying to say something like "my master is out using his good sword, so you'll have to make do with this worse sword instead". english is my first language and im not actually retarded so i cant believe this is how i interpreted this. i guess its just what i initially read as a kid and i never really gave it any thought until i was older and had an epiphany when i finally paid attention to it.
they shoulda called them paynehealers
>>12891417>english is my first languageI misread your post and thought this said English was NOT your first language and was ready to say that that interpretation actually makes a lot of sense to me given that it wasn't your native language. But then I reread and yeah now I agree with you, that is a pretty weird way to interpret that.
>>12890325Based
>>12890325The most disappointing thing about Max Payne, still to this day, is that he's not faster than a lazer bullet nor louder than an atom bomb. He is not chromium plated boiling metal. And he's definitely not brighter than a thousand suns.Otherwise, great game.
>They didn't call them paynekillersBiggest missed opportunity.
>>12890290I thought holding down B + Down would make me have a higher chance to catch the pokemon.You lied to me Marcus.
>>12890290I thought a Glock pointing its barrel upward when the slide moves back was a modeling error
>>12891527lol
>>12891417>>12891549It would have made sense if the game was full of Engrish but Zelda 1 has a pretty good translation for the most part from what I remember
>>12892628To this day I thought this was real. Not that I've thought about it in many years. I think everyone at school just thought so. Where did this come from?
I thought demo gameplay was cpu controlled instead of recorded by a human.
I thought that the internet just existed for every console, and that whoever made the game could update and tweak it whenever they wanted. And that's why tricks and cheats that friends told me at school would never work.
>>12890318He was in max pain perpetually
>>12890290>painkillers were just an invention of the gamei was already an adult in le gay olde army. and the painkillers didn't work. ^sob
>>12890290I thought that the Game Boy somehow knew what my name was because it was one of the options for Pokemon.
I thought Vice City was a romance game because of the heart on your HUD and the pretty setting. I was shocked to find out it's just about killing people.
>>12894343ur name is red ass jack? don't doxx yourself.
>>12893431it honestly might have been thought of independently by several people, something about it just seems intuitive, it's hard to prove wrong, and i think it's just a natural instinct when playing a video game to want to press buttons to make something happen rather than just sit there and wait while at the mercy of luck. plus button combinations like down+B were common in other games for things like charging, so if you're a kid wanting to imagine some way that you can keep a pokeball shut while a pokemon fights for its life, down+B makes about as much sense as anything.
>>12892628>holding down B + Down would make me have a higher chance to catch the pokemon.i still do it in emus. i think it's working!
in america painkillers are part of their daily diet. like those of us living in europe may have coffee, bread, cereal, or whatever for breakfast, americans are starting off their day with a handful of aspirin and ibuprofen.
>>12893709I-it isn't?
>>12894349kek
>>12891089Plenty of games were developed with that in mind as in you jumping into action and strafing and jumping or whatever and using cover was optional or considered holding back.
I just like to call "Max Payne", the game, as "Heavily Medicated Murderer". It's funnier if you think he's totally blitzed going through the Aesir Plaza, and that's why he's always smirking.
>>12895392It's a miracle he wasn't just trapped inside Aesir building at any moment even if they tried to jam the elevators or even worse jam them while he was between floors. At least they explained it with the snow storm that Horne didn't immediately just fly away with the helicopter when he could hear Max coming.
>>12895001We like our blood thin.
>>12891387>Aspirin doesn't come in prescription bottles.That's false dude.
>>12890318Aspiring towards what?
>>12894349>open world game where you seduce girls while driving aroundIt sounds like a 10/10 H-game.
>>12890290I believed that fake boobs were done in a similar manner as when you pumped up enemies in Dig Dug.
>>12890325Fuck yeah
>>12891089...are you stupid?Don't most cover based shooters include a tutorial mentioning the concept?
>>12890290Might as well be, pretty sure popping that many painkillers wpuld lead to an overdose. Its a videogame anon, dont think about it, ludo narrative dissonance and all that
>>12890325gay band, literally
>>12892817>pretty good translationIt could be worse but good is a stretch
>>12895874forgot pic
>>12895520Who the fuck prescribes aspirin? You can get both low dosage and extra strength over the counter.
>>12890290I still remember when I demystified the "retry" option after dying in nintendo games. It was originally just a nonsense arrangement of letters that I pronounced "ret-tree"... but I figured out that you could keep playing if you selected that after dying. Then one day I was staring at the word and it all made sense. The "try" at the end was the word Try... and the re meant like to do it again. The word was RE-TRY. TRY IT AGAIN!!!! OMFGSKJHDSJHKJHDKJHA IT WAS A WORD THE WHOLE TIME. A WORD THAT MEANT TRY AGAIN.
>>12895881He's technically right, high dose prescription aspirin exists. He's being a pedantic faggot though, because Max Payne is obviously eating narcotics out of prescription bottles, not tylenol.
>>12890290When I played Max Payne on the original Xbox, my dad said that painkillers were drugs; and since Winners don't use drugs, I was scared of using them in case my dad got mad at me. Never got particularly far in the game.
In the intro to Rayman 1, when the magician says "Troublesome, isn't it? And untidy, too.", I thought he said "And I'm Tiny, too.", so I thought his name was Tiny.
>>12895971 (Me)Also, in Pokemon Silver, when the policeman asks you the name of the rival, I literally put in "???", since the rival straight up tells you that's what his name is. Plus I was so young and new to games that I didn't realize it was just letting me name him. And my parents raised me better than to lie to a police officer!
>>12895948holy based
>>12895747Getting a little bit closer to heaven.
>>12895853I don't think he's talking about cover-based shooter mechanics (which were rightfully maligned and died out), I think he's talking physically moving the character behind obstacles and walls.
>>12890290>A wish chip is a folded-over or double-layered potato crisp found inside a regular bag of chipsI always though you weren't allowed to let it touch your tounge to make a wish. I spent years trying to eat a chip without it touching my tounge. It was only later that I found out I misheard "thumb" for "tounge".
>>12896175Kids are retarded. How close did you come to choking?
>>12895881I got prescribed Aspirin 3 or whatever it was called by the dentist.
>>12896196Never choked. I knew the tounge went all the way down the back of the throat so I thought it was impossible and therefore that it was some weird meta joke. Then I was talking to a friend one day and they explained it was thumb and not tounge, and it made much more sense.
>>12890290I thought all rapes automatically ended in murder, I didn't know someone could just be raped without killing them afterwards, so I thought all rape victims were also deceased murder victims
>>12892621but that would kill him.
>>12892628>>12894378when i was young it was that you have to press A at the same rhythm as the pokeball wobble.
>>12895878That part wasn't translatedhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SpwSB3EoD44
>>12896346You thought about the logistics of raping someone as a kid?
>>12891417>and im not actually retardedAnon, I...
>>12896175>>12896346Video games?
>>12895784>open world game where you seduce girls while driving aroundAnd in 80s Miami. Imagine it being based on Scarface where you're Manny just macking on bitches. The tongue trick being a super high risk but high reward move.
>>12896068Exactly what I meant. I played every shooter on easy because I obviously got wrecked otherwise. I couldn't fathom how it was possible to beat Halo on Legendary.
>>12896940You didn't?
Topic related and not game related, but as a kid I used to think you got AID's from having sex with someone who had already had sex before, like you were gene-locked into fucking one person for the rest of your life, otherwise you would get AID's and die.
>>12895747gettin high as fuk
>>12897792desu it SHOULD work like that.
>>12896940I watched the evening news every night with my Dad
I thought Halo and Metroid Prime were the same series since their protags look similar and they're both FPS
When I was a wee little dude, I thought ground type moves were super effective against ghosts. I even used the mnemonic of "You bury the dead" to remember. Imagine my fucking surprise when it turns out it was the poison half that it was super effective against.
>>12890290When I think one of my uncles first told me that games are stored inside "cassettes" (the term we use here), I was only able to have audio cassettes in mind. Some time later on, for some reason, I started thinking there was a chance that an audio cassette will become a playable cartridge if you just stick enough pretty drawings on it.Actually not sure if I really believed or if I was just trying to gaslight my old man into getting games. But I certainly did a fair bit of that shit. Too bad I kept nothing as souvenir kek.
>>12892628The variant that my brother and I did was to basically mash the d-pad and the two buttons by running our thumbs repeatedly over them.I once got a blister from doing that.
>>12900910>>12895974Also, this. I thought his name was literally "???".I also, for some weird reason, thought that he was wearing really short shorts or something in his battle sprite, that his white pants were his legs despite not matching the color of his face and hands.Yet somehow, I was able to piece together that he was Giovanni's son from a random Rocket scientist mentioning that their boss' son had red hair.
>>12895974Same. Neighbor kids made fun of me for it.
>>12890325I like Jewish Peach but the high vocals in that song gives me an aneurysm. Much prefer the normal vocals near the end.>>12896346No point in wasting a good body.
>>12890290>Dumb stuff you thought as a kidI thought Tails was a girl for some reason
>>12902272he is though?
>>12893709same. I had seen plenty of games where the computer controls characters to do stuff, so it seemed obvious enoughit wasn't until I watched a documentary about quake or something like that where one of the guys talks about recording demos and them playing out exactly the same and how difficult that actually is that that I realized that they were just recording a series of inputs which makes much more sense than creating a complex AI to control the player
>>12893709
>>12893709Well, it is in fighting games and racing
