How would he be running the chocolate factory in 2026
>>224026299h1b oompa jeetas
>>224026299Nestle merger. After that Charlie just fucked off to Epstein Island and gargled snozberries.
>>224026299Orange midgets replaced by jeets, minimal cocoa butter use, maximal palm oil, AI involved somehow.
Wonka bars - same price, 25% smaller
>>224026452obviously this. its never confirmed (to my knowledge) but the story obviously takes place in the UK or US so charlie definitely browned the assembly lines as soon as he could
>>224026452Oompas work for cocoa beansAt 15 beans per hour, an Oompa Loompa's raw commodity wage is only about $0.08 per hour. Even if they are paid a massive premium of 1,000 beans per hour (1 kg of cocoa), it still only equates to $5.45 an hourReplacing them with jeets is retarded, they're extremely cheap already
>>224026299>Blonde hair, blue eyes.Fire every orange, higher whites only, put activated breast milk in his new forumla, make chocolate great again and start anti peanut butter "charities".Heil Charlie.Heil Chocolate.Heil Victory.
>>224026626Fair point... I revise my prediction...Orange midgets reduced to working for 4 beans per hour instead of 15, minimal cocoa butter use, maximal palm oil, AI involved somehow, American conglomerate has taken over the business and started hiring jeets for the price of 2 beans per hour and access to a toilet which they will never use.
>>224026520The "chocolate" river would be brown for the same reasons as the ganjes.
>>224026299The kid can't actMoot just looks like he just shat himself
>monthly chocolate subscription box>download the app>mobile game>Fortnite collab
He'd probably make some garbage spicy mexican candy shit
>”Everlasting” gobstopper discontinued or moved to a subscription service >Mystery box candies>cut portion sizes, raise prices>more synthetic ingredients or cheap alternatives>a heckin subversive spicy candy with a massive social media marketing budget for some reason
>>224026326>>224026452What's up with all the anti Indian racism on this board recently? Is this a /pol/ psyop?
He'd change the Chocolate river to the Dubai chocolate river and it'd just look like a river of diarrhea
>>224028025It's not racism if you're the dominant ethnicity...isn't that the bullshit blacks use?Indian (from India) make up a significant percentage in global demographics. Basically they've overbred themselves into decadence in their own country they have "no choice" but to spill over to other countries to do the same here (in the west), that they wouldn't do in their own country.They're are in fact a 'virus' among humanity generalize problem with overpopulation.
>>224026299AI art on the new products
>>224026326He would use the oompas as sex slaves
>>224028025It's just the same shit the right always does to distract from bigger issues, only it has ironically been having the opposite effect thanks to the internet.>2000s>Right wingers obsess over niggers>Obama becomes president, black people become more prominent in media, etc>Obsession turns to fags in the 2010s, resulting in gay marriage being legalized and the sudden rise of pride merch being everywhere>Once again the obsession becomes about troons in the 2020s, resulting in trans people becoming more normalized and more major celebrities being transDon't be surprised if we get something like Pajeet Pride or something as a result
>>224026452Every wonka ad would have a black man with a white woman
>>224028581All of those things are legit problemsYou are low iq
>>224027515As far as the Oompas go, he'd probably force them all to dress in Labubu costumes to remain relevant. He would also mostly use them for social media advertising so everyone's feed would be flooded with the Ooompas
I'd kill for five minutes of some gobstopping, let alone everlasting.
By waiting for the atmosphere to freeze into a new ice age and build a train with magical properties and leave the poor to starve to death as Chris Evans prepares a revolution.
>>224028581You forgot the anti-Mexican and anti-Muslim eras. We used to call people Muhammad instead of saar.
>>224028025People desperate for (You)doots saw their favorite e-daddies and comedians tell racist jokes and try to do the same thing but are too clumsy or low IQ to actually create racist jokes and just say a racism-arino (and then get mad that no one laughs).
