I'm from your roommate's grocery store. Prepare to die.>what?>why?>run>fight
>>6456255>fightcome at the king you'd best not miss
>>6456255>>fightSir, I advise you this: I am a lawful gun owner
Rolled 44 (1d69)>>6456255>what?
>>6456255>fightYou look like a bitch, whatever my roomate did to you, you deserved it.
You took 1 damage (???)HP: 99I have a gun, you say. You look like a bitch.Cash or card?? It's fifty five. Manager?Sir, you have to leave now. You've made the cashier uncomfortable.Your roommate's grocery store is now explaining that you have made threats with a gun.And stay away from the crack house too.>try to explain>threaten again>go home>go to the crack house
>>6456295>Shoot the gun into the ceiling then leave for the cracked house
>>6456295>threaten again>point gun at selfI AM GONNA DO IT I SWEAR TO FUCK
>>6456303The cashier casts an illusion spell. Bystanders see a western movie scene where he is wearing a police badge and shoots you.You take 50 damage (psychic)HP: 49You pull out your real gun in real life and make incoherent threats and threatening gestures. People are scared for real.
>>6456301You then shoot your gun into the ceiling and leave for the crack house.I am the crack house lord. I know you made threats with a gun. I know you shot your gun into the ceiling. All these crack heads and crack whores belong to me. You do not belong here. Leave now.>what?>I'm a girl>go home>fight
>>6456318>Shoot the illusion four times
>>6456330Ignore this>>6456328>Beseech the Crack Lord for a Quest
>>6456331This, the crack of dawn shines.
>>6456331>>6456342You take 10 damage (???)HP: 39A quest? Are you dense or something? I told you, I know what you did at your roommate's grocery store. You do know your roommate is from hell, don't you? I don't know why they let that person be roommates with you, but obviously they got what they needed, and you so conveniently gave them plenty of excuses to be rid of you. I imagine your roommate's grocery store already called their cops on you, and they'll be finding you at any moment. Go on, get out of here, and don't bother looking for that gun of yours.>what?>I'm a girl>go home>fight
>>6456424>what?what is going on man
>>6456424>>what?Sir, i quite literally have no idea what is going on.
>>6456424>Look for the gun I legally purchased that firearm and am licensed to carry it concealed on my person!!!!
>>6456425>>6456532>>6456533Smoke this crack right now before I fuck you up>Smoke the crack>go home>fight
>>6456790>No seriously look for the gun I can smoke crack later but I need my firearm, it's bought it from a local FFL gun dealer and the serial number is associated with me - it could be VERY bad for me legally if someone else misuses it
>>6456790>go home
This is awesome
>>6456929>>6456930>>6457332You've patted yourself but your gun is not on your person. You have to accept that it's missing. Crack house lord smokes the crack as you walk away.I'm moving out My grocery store says that they have killed you. I'm going to live with my grocery store. Good bye.Your gun missing could be very bad for you legally if someone misuses it. You want to report it missing right away. You can hear a fart cannon from your ex-roommates grocery store racing towards your home. It stops right in front of your home.>Report your missing gun>Talk to fart cannon>Consider going back to crack house
>>6457362>Use a divination ritual to discover the whereabouts of my gun
>>6457397As you ponder the whereabouts of your missing gun, fart cannon's gf with one hand takes a picture of you while smoking crack with the other. Fart cannon speeds away, and suddenly the police are at your house.Get down on the ground>Report your missing gun>Comply>Fight>Run
>>6457476>FightTime is a flat circle. I have given up on the gun, the rules of this world are stupid, meaningless, and arbitrary, and no matter what I choose to do, I inexplicably fail. I choose the middle way. I will be a pugilist, unburdened by the mechanisms, inputs, or limitations of the 'firearm'. I am at peace with the absurdity and pointlessness of this baffling world. I am a monk. But I am a warrior. I will fight the chaos with my bare hands. >Fight Hard, discombobulate to the head, crane kick to the officer's jaw, five point palm exploding heart technique to the chest.
>>6457480Do you have any crack on you? You made the wrong choice discombobulating my partner over there, pal. My partner is from your ex-roommates grocery store, and they're not going to let people say you crane kicked one of them in the jaw. You're under arrest for suspicion of attempting to lure crack whores, attempted murder, and 2 murders. That's right, we found your gun at the crack house, we know you killed that crack head and crack whore. Maybe you thought that nobody would care about a crack head and a crack whore, but you were wrong. Your ex-roommate's grocery store went over there to rape that crack head and crack whore and found them dead with your gun. Here's what's going to happen, you're going to be a murderer and we're going to lock you up and lose the key and you're going to die there, and because we have your gun, we won't even be called negligent.>You know where my gun is?>I'm a girl>Ask for a lawyer
>>6457500I have accepted that life is suffering. You cannot punish me in any way that matters. >Kick his head off of his shoulders then go find a place to meditate
>>6457518Your ex-roommate's grocery store's psychiatric facility wardHP: 90So, I've been assigned to read your evaluation. Do you know why you're here? It says your mental faculties are below that of a 4 year old. Do you remember learning not to hit? Let's see here, threats with a gun, discharging firearm in public, suspicion of attempting to lure a crack whore, attempted murder, murder, all in one day? What happened to you? It says you used to be a law-abiding citizen and permitted gun owner, and then one day you went to your roommate's grocery store? Do you remember that day? Explain what happened.>What?>I'm a girl>Fight
>>6457585>I'm a girlExplain you were deep undercover and trying to rescue the crack whores to build a sisterhood and soup kitchen.If they doubt you then cancel them with extreme prejudice.
>>6458354Pardon. It's not that you are terribly ugly, but I can see why no one noticed that you are a girl until now. If it is true what you say, then why did you kill that crack whore. But that is not why I am here. I am FBI. I am investigating the murder of the crack whore at the crack house as a favor to your district representative. That crack whore was your district representative's favorite crack whore. What we need from you is the crack whore's cell phone. Don't get any ideas, there is no scandal here. The district representative and that crack whore were approved by god. Just tell us where you put the cell phone, and maybe you can get some leniency.>I didn't do it>(Lie) The phone is at home>(Lie) I gave the phone to fart cannon's gf
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>6458601>write inRolling for QM to put atleast a little more effort into drawing
>>6458601>Bitch I know you aint from that FBI. Bought that hat at the grocery store didn't you? Try and get me to give you a grill's number on the side?>Abscond
>>6458956win
